So the show starts with Estrada in the ring, which is full of weapons. With no surprise, the first match with extreme rules, which brings a nice cheer from the crowd. He's gonna handle Justin Robert's duties for this match apparently as he introduces the wrestlers.

Big Daddy V over Tommy Dreamer by Samoan drop through a table
Dreamer doesn't look very enthusiastic. Remember, this is the guy who didn't blink at fighting the Big Show in the first few weeks of ECW to welcome his to the program. Dreamer starts in on V, but attempts a body slam and gets crushed for his troubles. He goes for the kendo stick but it gets snapped in two. V crushes Dreamer with a chair, wedges a shopping cart in the corner and slams Dreamer, following that up withh tossing him into the cart in the corner.

V sets up Dreamer in the corner and runs to splash him, but Dreamer moves out of the way, which gives him time to grab a table, but he gets cut off before he can get back into the ring. V sends him back into the ring and follows with a few headbutts, then grabs the table Dreamer brought into the ring. The table's set up in the middle of the ring and Dreamer's got a trash can, which does NOTHING to V. V throws Dreamer to the ropes and hits a Samoan drop onto the table for the three count.

Uh oh. Vince is on the program tonight. Dammit.

We're reminded that there's an ECW title match this weekend and this time we're shown a nice little package on C.M. Punk.

But back to Vince, who is still looking for his kid with the Coach at his side. Coach hints that there's a wrestler that fits the bill, and it's Balls Mahoney! Balls and Vince have a pretty funny exchange that ends with Vince yelling "I HAVE NO BALLS" at Balls Mahoney. That's pretty good stuff. I'm informed that was shot at Saturday Night's Main Event, but not shown on the broadcast. Oh well, still funny.

Elijah Burke vs. Balls Mahoney
Balls has pretty good crowd support. Match starts with a combo of headlocks and hammer locks til Balls throws Burke to the ropes and sholder blocks him down. Balls gets Burke from behind in a reverse waist lock and Elijah reverses it into a hammer lock. Balls reverses it, Burke runs to the ropes and gets hit with a HARD arm drag by Balls.

Balls goes for the punches, but Burke cuts it short with a punch from underneath and sends hi shoulder first into the ring post. Elijah brings a towel into the ring, but the ref tyakes it away long enough for Burke to get behind him and throw Balls' leg into the post. Elijah hits the hanging elbow and focuses on Balls' shoulder.

Burke pulls on Balls arm, which gets the crowd behind him, which of course means his rally will be cut short, and it is. An inside cradle on Burke gets a two after the both miss elbows on the canvas. TWO!

Balls hits Burke with some punches and a clothesline, which leads to THE punches, which Balls hits all of them. Burke walks into a big spinebuster, but it only gets a two. TWO!

Burke comes back and focuses on the arm and misses a splash in the corner and gets rolled up for a three! Balls celebrates with the crowd, and is still selling the shoulder. Nice touch.

We transition into John Morrison's video package.

Did you know Triple H is coming back? Just in case you didn't, they have a video package for you.

Backstage, Balls is insulted by the Miz, who insinuates that Balls needs money for a girl like Kelly Kelly.

Backstage Kevin Thorn gives a few moments of an interview before being interrupted by Stevie! Ha! Arn Anderson and Mike Rotundo are there again to separate the two wrestlers. Good thing Stevie jumped him, because if I had to listen to Thorn speak for a second more I would have thrown up.

Back to the important stuff, Vince is still looking for his bastard. Coach brings in C.M. Punk. Punk says "Hi Vince", but is met with "That's Mr. McMahon." Vince reminds us about Punk beings straight edge and Punk comes back with what else he doesn't do.

Punk: There's one other thing I don't do Vince. I don't have dirty unprotected sex with some money-grubbing skank who eventually files a paternity suit against me, which gets me kicked out of my own house which leaves with nothing but a living breathing national disgrace.

Nice.

John Morrison & The Miz over CM Punk & The Boogeyman
After a few minutes of entrances, we're ready to actually star this thing. I can't imagine this ending cleanly, but I've been surprised before. We start with Miz and Punk. Miz gives a shove and Punk gives three round house kicks. Punk tags in Boogeyman and Boogey threatens the Miz with some worms. The Miz runs behind the girls, which prompts Boogey to throw the worms on them. Whoops.

After a short commercial break we're back and Punk has control over Morrison, but that doesn't last long. After a few back and forth running reversals, Punk gets Morrison with a high kick. Boogey is tagged in and spits worms on Morrison. Gross. Morrison ducks a shot on the apron and hits Boogey with a standing enziguiri. Boogey goes for the throat, but is cut off short with a boot to the gut.

Morrison goes into the corner and Boogey grabs the legs and pulls to launch Morrison into the air and fips and lands on his stomach. Nice. The Miz is tagged in and Boogey has to pull him into the ring. Boogey grabs a leg and Punk tags himself in behind Boogey ad hits a NASTY STANDING ENZIFUIRI to the back of the Miz' head. AWESOME.

Punk attacks with some chops and gets a whip tot eh corner reversed. No problem as he raises a boot to block it. Punk goes to the top turnbuckle, but Morrison pushes him and sends him crashing to the floor. Miz puts on some hurtin and sends him back to the ring. The Miz pounds on Punk for a moment and walks him to the heel corner and Morrison is tagged in and Punk and Morrison have each other in a move that I can't quite place but it look similar to what happens right before you drop a neckbreaker.

Morrison continues the punishment and tags in the Miz. The Miz gets a two. TWO! and goes for the shoulder/neck. Punk punches out of a submission, but his comeback gets cut short, as usual on WWE programming. The Miz gets a double leg takedown and goes for a catapult into an elbow from Morrison. Morrison only gets a two after a springboard elbow. TWO! A clothesline and another two. TWO!

Punk pulls Punk away from the face corner, holds the leg and tags in the Miz, who drops a few elbow and why don't I continue this run on sentence? Morrison tags in and goes for a headlock, which gets fought out of by Punk. Morrison puts Punk on the top turnbuckle, but it gets reversed into a sunset flip/power bomb. Morrison tags in the Miz who cuts off Punk before he can get to Boogey. Punk hits a backslide for a two. TWO! Punk hits a powerslam for a two. TWO!

Morrison takes out Boogey and Punk planchas Morrison outside the ring, followed by a springboard splash inside the ring. That gets a two, TWO! and Punk goes for a GTS on the Miz, who tags in Morrison Morrison waits until after Punk hits the GTS and hits an enziguiri and whatever his swinging finisher is called.

That's the show for this week. Not bad for a PPV lead off. I'd like to see more ECW matches happening at the PPV, but I suppose that I can't have everything. Or two ECW matches.

So you'll see two different sets of thoughts on the show tonight. My thoughts, and the thoughts of my wife, who doesn't watch ECW ever. There's a reason for this, as us wrestling fans don't usually get to see the show from the opinion of someone who is watching for the first time. Yeah, I might complain about move selection for the match, but it's something completely different when someone who hasn't seen John Morrison makes his usual speech and calls it "boring". Maybe every now and again, it's good to hear a fresh voice.

His thoughts:

Okay, so why are we starting this show with something that happened on RAW last night? This is EXTREME CHAMPIONSHIP WRESTLING. Not RAW.

We're back to the Marilyn Manson this week, which makes twice in a row. I dig the intro, which I couldn't tell you if it is brand new, but it's kinda new.

We're starting the show with Jonathan Coachman??? ON RAW??? COME ON. This crap was off my show for so long. We were free from the crap booking of RAW for so so long. The Coach says that he's got some business to attend to.

AN ECW GENERAL MANAGER. ARMANDO ESTRADA.

Double M spotted Estrada on RAW last night, and I suppose this is why. Estrada gets the "what" treatment as he's reading from his script, staring at the C camera, talking to the people at home, but no one in the arena. He's here to do the signing of the ECW title match between Punk and Morrison.

Morrison makes his entrance first, this time, finally without the Johnny Nitro jacket. I suppose he finally saved up enough money to buy himself a few jackets. Estrada announces Punk and my hometown goes nuts for Punk, as expected.

We get the WWE staredown over the table. Why do they feel the nee dto do these "signings" in public? Morrison spews his usual crap. He's always got his sun glasses on, maybe so he can read the script a little better. Morrison signs without piquing my interest in the least and Punk gives the contract a look over. Morrison taunts a little bit before Punk reminds him that he won the match last night. Morrison comes back with more boring rhetoric. Punk tells him to "SHUT IT" and actually shows some life on the mic. Punk puts up some nice mic work before signing the contract.

The stare down some more before Estrada separates them and tells them both they have matches tonight. Punk has Big Daddy V and Morrison has the Boogeyman. Remember what I said about good matches last week? Forget it.

You know, with Punk, Estrada and Morrison, this is looking more and more like OVW. Let's sign Brent Albright and have ourselves some fun!

Her thoughts:


i would think that vince mcmahon's daughter would be hotter...

rob is mad because ecw is broadcasting about an hour from our house.

there's an illegitimate child story-line, and i think this is stupid.

some guy with cigars in his pocket is ecw's new general manager. his suit is white, and it's faggy looking. his facial hair looks like pubes. i don't get why there's all this talking and bullshit when I'm supposed to be watching wrestling. I'm bored.

rob just told me ecw is an hour long... it's 10:05 and feels like forever.

John Morrison is a macho hippie, which is just retarded.

cm punk looks like some greasy guy that i have nightmares about my daughter bringing home. it looks like he's in a teeshirt and underpants. listening to these guys talk hurts my head. it's like a slutty chick fight, except with deeper voices

His thoughts:

Big Daddy V over CM Punk by count out
Big Daddy V looks more buttery than usual this week. The CT crowd is firmly behind Punk, if they weren't they wouldn't be able to see past V. Punk tries a go behind, but V squashes him into the corner. V sends him to the other corner and slaps, head butts and kicks Punk a few times, but Punk turns around and hits two rising knees, but is caught on the second one and is sent to the canvas in a modified power bomb.

Punk goes for a ride in a gorilla press and is dropped to the canvas and V plods around the ring a bit more before screaming a few unintelligible words. V hits a rolling kick on Punk to send him out of the ring. Tazz and Joey are talking about how flexible V is. Gelatin is pretty flexible. Punk tries getting into the ring and is sent back out by V, who simply runs at the ropes and sends Punk into the announce table.

And... Punk is counted out? WHAT? CM PUNK JUST LOST BY COUNT OUT?

Pretty much Punk was just completely squashed by V shortly before fighting for the ECW championship. How does this make sense?

The replay of Big Daddy V running reveal the reason why the tides change. Big Daddy V's always jiggly, always moving boobies.

Her Thoughts:
the guy with the tattoos on his stomach has stars on his underwear, and so do i. i'm never wearing these drawers again.

now there's a fat guy that I don't see the smaller guy with stars on his panties doing a very good job of taking down. yup. ok, there he goes. that was fast. the big fat guy looks angry.

ugh! jiggly man boobs! the big guy has a nasty, greasy body, and i'm pretty sure Star-panties is screwed.

big guy is holding Star-Panties package and threw him now, and now Star-Panties is being bitch slapped. I kind of have reached the conclusion that this match is sort of stupid, because it's obvious that greasy Man Boobs is able to clobber Star Panties.

Yup. Sorry Star Panties. He doesn't look so well. Man boobs is gloating over his win, like beating a guy 200 pounds less than you is something to be proud of. Stupid.

His thoughts:

Estrada meets with Dreamer, who wants an ECW championship shot after Summerslam. Estrada calls Dreamer lazy and gives him a minute to get to the ring. Tommy prett ymuch has everyone in his way including Stevie, Nunzia, a catering guy and Extreme Expose. When he gest to the ring he's got to fight... BIG DADDY V?

Tommy Dreamer vs. Big Daddy V
So why do we have to watch fat bastard once more? As expected, V makes short work of Dreamer. This is depressing. The MSG crowd gets Saturday Night's Main Event and the Connecticut crowd gets two Big Daddy V matches?

They tease the Morrison vs. Boogeyman match again before revealing Stevie vs. Thorn III.

Her Thoughts:
Talking. I really hate the "spontaneous" conversation in the hallways. It's kinda dumb. Some guy is going to run to the ring, to fight whoever he finds there.

Some Guy is running to the ring in 60 seconds, limping. Ok, you're a big wrestler. Quit limping.

Ha! he has to fight Greasy Man Boobs. He's a little bigger than Star Panties, but I doubt this is going to go well. Yup. He's done. Sorry Some Guy. Man Boobs is celebrating again. I'd like to see him take someone his own size. Wait, IS there anyone his own size?

His Thoughts:

We're back at Mohegan Sun. We relive the moments last week seeing Balls getting his clock cleaned by the Miz. We cut backstage and Kelly Kelly is interrupted by Balls, who attempts to ask her out. The Miz interrupts with Brooke and Layla and... bullies Balls Mahoney? Balls gest serious and scares off the Miz, who takes Kelly with him. Poor Balls. He's going to have to go to Michael Jordan's Steakhouse by himself tonight. Or the Summer Shack, which is excellent.

Okay, now were going back to Stevie getting his ass kicked last week backstage before Arn Anderson and IRS stepped in.

Stephen Richards over Kevin Thorn by reversed decision
He's "Stephen" Richards tonight. thorn overpowers Stevie and slaps him in the corner before Stevie presses on Thorn, giving a few punches before being clotheslines. thorn throws Stevie around the ring a little bit. Stevie nuts up and unloads some punches before being cut short and thrown with a nice body slam. Thorn attacks the back with some knees and hits Stevie with a diving clothesline. Thorn goes for a headlock and Stevie calls out for the yuppies of Connecticut to help him out of it. thorn hits him with a short clothesline and Thorn yells "How dare you beat me?"

That's what's known as a "bad attitude".

Thorn hits a nasty clothesline and Stevie still kicks out at two. TWO!

thorn sends Stevie to the ropes and Stevie comes back with a forearm, them a few kicks and something that looks like a backstabber from the front, but for a two. TWO! Sunset flip for a two. TWO!

Thorn hits a big spine buster and... gets a three? What? What's with the endings this week?

Thorn hits Stevie with a crucifix power bomb and the ref reverses his decision. So... STEVIE WINS! Three in a row. Color me surprised.

Her Thoughts:

Mohegan Sun.

It's not a nice restaurant. the food there sucks. my PSA of the night.

OOO, wrestling again. Now there's a goth looking guy wrestler. He looks like those losers from highschool that are "misunderstood" and "going though a phase".

Looser.

He's fighting a skinny guy in red boyshorts. Now it's interesting; they look pretty well matched, even though Goth Looser is kind of "doughy".

Goth Looser looks like he's kicking the crap out of Red Shorts, and I'm surprised. My money was on the guy who had discernible muscles.

Headlock...

"How dare you beat me!" declared the Goth Looser. REALLY? Isn't that the point?

Red Shorts is coming back, and it's about time! ooo, no. Red Shorts is going down.

Goth Looser WON?! What the fuck?!

Slowly, Goth Looser caressed his opponent's stomach... homo. What's THAT move called? Ah, now he's kicking his ass some more, even after being declared the winner.

Oh, now the decision is reversed by the ref. because of "bad attitude", and angry Goth Looser is glaring through his eyeliner. Ha! I liked Red Shorts best anyway. Too bad he looks like he has a broken neck and can't celebrate.

His Thoughts:

Elijah Burke is talking with the Coach about his childhood. Blah.

Tazz and Joey go into hard sell mode for Summerslam before John Morrison makes his way to the ring. Why does he have a furry coat again? I just got finished saying that he dropped that stupid shit.

Her Thoughts:

I'm going to be excited, and this is going to be way more fun, if I can see John Cena wrestle. I just saw a promo for something with his face on it, and now my interest is peaked. He's the only wrestler who I know by sight, thanks to a lifesize cutout of him in the local Spencer Gifts. I usually have to restrain myself from humping it when I walk by.

You know how some couples have "the list" of famous people you can cheat on should the opportunity arise? John Cena is number one on mine.

His Thoughts:

We're back and here comes the main event.

The Boogeyman over John Morrison by DQ
If I were in the audience, I'd be pissed. Boogey is back to his old makeup, not the straight red and black tonight. A shame, cause the black and red was pretty good compared to this Ultimate Wohyah stuff.

Boogey hits a firemans carry and leapfrogs Morrison. Morrison gets sent from one corner to the other gets his with a splash and a clothesline. Boogey hits a body slam and a running splash for a two. TWO!

Joey compares this McMahon shit to the sword of Damacles. Bleck.

Bogey goes up top, but Morrison kicks him to the outside, but throws him back in, but that only gets a two. TWO! Morrison pounds on the ground and goes for another pin. Two. TWO!

Oh. My. God. The crowd is chanting for the Boogeyman. It's like they know exactly what I never thought would happen.

Morrison locks Boogey's arm, but he powers out, throws a few punches and whips him to the ropes and hits a clothesline, a body slam and a leg drop for a two. TWO!

Boogey stalks Morrison, but Morrison thrusts into the throat of the Boogeyman to take control.

Morrison climbs up to the top rope and COMPLETELY BLOWS A TOP ROPE CORKSCREW MOONSAULT. He missed him by at least 4 or five feet. I'm talking about a completely blown spot. What does he follow it up with? ANOTHER BLOWN SPOT as Morrison can't get a springboard kick. He cant pin Boogey near the ropes and attempts to drag him away as Boogey holds on tight. This has gotten bad.

Morrison shoves the ref and... gets disqualified? Post match Boogeyman goes for the worms and Morrison gets the hell out of Dodge. What a friggin mess of a match. Morrison missed two spots in HUGE ways. That's the kinda thing that costs you titles in the minds of agents kid. Hope you enjoyed the run, cause you just messed up bad on live TV.

Her Thoughts:

From the "bottomless pit", with worms coming out of his mouth... ugh. I don't think I like this wrestler. He's creepy.

Yup. This is disgusting. The Macho Hippie just got a worm spit at him. Really? How much does this guy get paid to drool worms? Does PETA know about this guy?

Hey, Macho Hippie! A guy who drools worms is kicking your ass! Maybe your velvet pants are getting in the way.

I don't think I can root for either of these guys. They both deserve to have their asses kicked. Where's greasy Man Boobs? I bet he can take both of them. I'm not into the creepy worm drooling, or the faggy velvet pants.

Now the Macho Hippie threw himself off of the top rope and MISSED the creepy guy completely. Now he's stumbled off the rope trying to do a fancy foot kick. Maybe he should stay off the ropes?

Uh oh. Creepy guy won and now, post-win he has thrown Macho Hippie to the ground and is attempting to give him mouth-to-mouth worms. THAT? Is nasty. Worms? In your mouth? Twice? To spit in another man's mouth?

Where I grew up, you got shot for trying stuff like this.

---

So we start the show with a recap of last week's main event.

We're back to the Marilyn Manson theme this week. What the hell is going on with this show? Just a little bit of consistency would be nice.

We start with the Boogeyman making his way down to the ring and Jesse Guilmette is already in the ring. Uh oh.

Boogeyman over a Red Shirt by frogsplash
poor Jesse Guilmette. Boogey makes short work of of his with a few clotheslines, a body slam, a power slam and... a frog splash? Post match, we get the usual worm celebration and to add insult to injury, Boogey makes Guilmette eats worms. Striker comes out to attempt to talk sense into Boogey, calling him uncouth and telling him to get out of his life.

This lasts just long enough for Big Daddy V to begin clobberin' time on Boogey. Hearing Striker call out for "more Daddy, more is kinda disturbing. Boogey sells the beat down and Big Daddy V does his best Mark Henry impersonation standing over him.

Dusty Rhodes: I'll tell ya baby, national television exposure!

Jesse Guilmette: The money's right.

Dusty Rhodes: Alright Jesse-baby! Get out there and lose to the Boogeyman.

Jesse Guilmette: Alright! Let's do it.

Dusty Rhodes: And you have to get worms in your mouth at the end.

Jesse Guilmette: What?

Dusty: Go go go! Time to go on!

So the only mention I can find of this dude online is him being trained at Les Thatcher's wrestling school. School teaches wrestling, and, more importantly, how to entertain. He's a footnote in the article, so don't get too excited. I suppose the WWE likes Les' school.

We go "moments ago" to watch Big Daddy V dismantling Boogey, so no one's excitement. It's hard for me to root for this joker. I still root for anyone who's fighting against him. Hell, I wanted Guilmette to win the match. Anyway, Elijah Burke comes to the ring and he's looking as upset as ever. Maybe it's cause his braids are different this week.

Elijah Burke over Tommy Dreamer by Elijah Express
Tazz calls Tommy "all business" as he takes a moment to slap hands with anyone at ringside. I see an error there. Anyway, collar and elbow to start with Elijah getting the advantage, but Dreamer fights out with some kicks and knocks him out of the ring with a clothesline. Tommy follows suit and Elijah slams him off of the ring apron.

Elijah throws Dreamer into the ring and stomps the back for fun and Elijah hits the hanging elbow, this week without almost falling over the other side of the top rope. That only gets a one and goes to the surfboard. Dreamer turns that into a back suplex and follows it up with some punches. Dreamer locks on the Texas Cloverleaf. I mark out and Burke grabs the bottom ropes. Dreamer keeps holding onto the legs and catapults Elijah to the turnbuckle. Tommy goes for the DDT and Elijah drops to the ground. Elijah goes to the ropes as Tommy pursues and gets a boot to the face as Burke flips over the ropes and goes to the top turnbuckle.

Dreamer throws a few haymakers and goes for a superplex, but Elijah reverses it and pulls Tommy's neck down over the top rope. The kneepads are down and Elijah hits the Express and gets a three count easy as Elijah solidifies himself as the #3 ma on the show (following Morrison and Punk).

We go to the back to the #1 man in the company who gives his thoughts on his 15 minute match with Punk tonight. His thoughts are that he's... well a bunch of rhetorical statements. He thinks Punk is excited to have 15 minutes of Morrison in the ring, but the rest of us are bored after 2 minutes of Morrison speaking.

It's the Miz and the Nitro Girls! Everyone celebrate! Wait, did I just say celebrate? I meant sulk. The girls sit ringside and the Miz gets a mic. He does the usual "chick magnet" schtick until Balls' music hits.

The Miz over Balls Mahoney by Reality Check
Round II. Remember when Balls beat Masato Tanaka at One Night Stand II? Shame they haven't let him win other matches. Balls goes to the Balls punches quick, but gets kicked a few times and knocked out of the ring. Kelly helps him up slowly and Balls gives a little grin until the Miz pulls him back into the ring. Miz hits the Reality Check and this thing's over. The Reality Check is a pretty ice series of a knee lift and a neck breaker. KElly Kelly looks a bit upset over Balls' misfortune.

We go backstage to the #2 man in the company who's discussing how he's gonna approach the match tonight. He throws out the rhetoric about being straight edge and his only addiction being competition and that's about it.

They replay Vince's return to RAW. There were two good things about RAW last night. The first was Santino's line of "I am in terrible pain" and the second was Vince telling Paul London to "keep smiling".

They replay the unlikely wins of Stevie Richards and they go backstage to Stevie! He gets about two sentences in before he;s absolutely clobbered by Kevin Thorn. This lasts a few moments before it's broken up by a few referees, Arn Anderson and Mike Rotundo.

John Morrison makes his way out to the ring and now his music has lyrics. I can't make any of them out, probably to my benefit. Quick commercial break...

By the way, I know this probably isn't the place for it, but Anderson Cooper 360 uses the old La Resistance theme. Check it out some day, it's entertaining. I wonder if they paid for it?

CM Punk over John Morrison by GTS with 0:05 remaining
So this is a 15 minutes of fame match. Punk doesn't even have to win. Considering it's 10:45, there's a good chance that it's gonna go the full 15. Match starts and Morrison makes a point of pointing out the clock... seemingly wasting time? Them Punk makes a point to point out the crowd. Collar and elbow to start all around the ring, it gets broken up in the corner and more facing down. 14:00 left. Punk gets an arm bar and turns it into a seated hammer lock. Morrison gets up and grabs a leg , but gets kicked off by Punk.

More stare down and Punk goes behind and gets a takeover into a front chancery as we hit the 13:00 mark. Morrison reverses it and can only get a one and goes into a rear choke. Punk powers out and sweeps the leg and slaps in a rear choke of his own. Morrison goes tot he ropes at 12:00. Morrison throws some punches and surfboards Punk using his hair to stare at the clock. Morrison gets a few kicks in and gets a whip to the corner reversed at 11:00. Punk hits a drop kick NASTY on Morrison into the corner and can only get a two. TWO!

Punk hits a few kicks and twists a hammerlock into a clothesline. Morrison slams Punk at 10:00 and hits his swinging leg drop on Punk. Punk goes and gets kicked in the gut by Morrison a few times before clearing Morrison out of the ring with a clothesline and follows it up with a plancha. Punk gets Morrison into the ring at 9:00, but Morrison follows that by drop kicking Punk to the floor.

Morrison pulls Punk back, but Punk suplexes Morrison to the floor from the ring apron! We head to commercial with 8:00 left.

We're back at 4:00 and Morrison's got Punk in what looks like a Cobra Clutch on Punk, a two count (TWO!) and a leg lariat by Morrison. Morrison goes to the second rope and misses a corkscrew moonsault. At 3:00 Punk throws some sloppy punches, hits a few kicks and a clothesline. This is followed with some knees, a whip to the corner, the knee in the corner and a bulldog. Punk puts an exclaimation point on it with a springboard clothesline, but only gets a two. TWO!

At 2:00 Punk rolls Morrison up and Punk hits a standing enziguiri for a two. TWO! Morrison ducks a clothesline and hits a modified backbreaker and neckbreaker for a two. TWO! A few punches later Punk tries for a sunset flip and Morrison goes for a crab unsuccessfully and goes for a catapult. Punk stands n the ropes and tries for a sunset flip and gets a two at 1:00. TWO!

Punk has Morrison up for the GTS but Morrison elbows his way out of it. Mirrison blows a springboard enziguiri, but because of the time crunch he just rears back and kicks Punk in the face. We've got :30 left and Morrison goes for a pin. TWO!

:20 and Morrison gets reversed into the GTS. At :10 Punk hits the GTS and goes for the pin with 0:05 left on the clock. Punks' heading to Summerslam for a title shot and we just had ourselves a great main event between these two guys.

Originally posted atInside Pulse

Looks like we're keeping Marilyn Manson as the music for ECW. I think they could have done better, but I guess that they need to promote something that's not Drowning Pool. Joey and Tazz try to sell us on some "reporters" being outside the champ's locker room. Someone walks out to say that this is the last time that we'll see Johnny Nitro on ECW. I suppose they're trying to make people stay tuned later. I don't think it'll work, I think most people will be checking the internet after the show later.

CM Punk over Elijah Burke by GTS
Wow, opening with this one? Interesting choice, but I guess they're going to try to keep us in suspense, even though no one really cares and people want to see Punk wrestle.

Staredown to start as both men acknowledge the crowd's chanting for Punk. Burke challenges Punk to start in the middle of the ring. Punk lets Burke know that the crowd is firmly behind him. Burke circles CM Punk and they go into a collar an elbow and Burke powers Punk into the corner. They circle on the ropes and they get tangled and separate.

both men are slow to get into a test of strength and Punk pulls Burke's arm around with one arm, then Punk lifts Burke and drops him while still twisting the wrist. Punk grabs Burke in an arm bar, then rolls him through by his head and drops some knees on the arm while still holding the arm bar. Punk holds Burke's arm in a submission before Burke powers out and knock Punk down with what looked like a push. A push? Nah, he hooked the leg and then missed a short elbow.

Punk goes back to the arm (which will REALLY stop the Elijah Express, right?) and kicks Burke in the ribs a few times before throwing Burke shoulder first into the turnbuckle while in a hammer lock. Punk can only get a one.

Punk gets a body slam and a short leg drop for a two. TWO! Punk goes back to the shoulder as Burke powers out and pushes Punk to the corner. Clean break, then a boot to Punk's midsection. Burke pounds on Burke, gets a snap mare and finally hits that short elbow for a two. TWO!

A few more forearms to the back by Burke before Punk reverses a suplex attempt for a two. TWO! Back to a triangle submission on the arm and Burke powers out and gets a whip reversed into the opposite corner, but drills Punk with a boot reversal.

Boot vs. Face. Face rarely wins.

Burke sets Punk up near the ropes and jumps to sit on the top rope and pulls Punk out with his legs. Both men are out, so we're going to commercial.

We're back and Punk is hurt and Burke is going after the leg with a single leg Boston crab. The crowd is behind Punk, but that doesn't help him get to the ropes. Burke cuts the crab short and drops a few elbows and forearms on the lower back of Punk. That can only get a two. TWO!

Burke goes back to the legs and this time he grabs both legs and cinches in the Boston crab. Punk powers out and drags himself ALMOST to the ropes and teases a tap out. Instead, he grabs the ropes. I think he should have tried that first. Burke goes back to Punk's legs, but gets kicked instead.

In the corner, Burke tries a few punches, but they're reversed by Punk as Punk battles out and hits a few kicks for good measure. Burke cuts off Punk's attempts at something off the ropes with a punch in the midsection and an uppercut to the side of the head. That gets a two. TWO!

Burke drops CM Punk into a seated position and hits a shoulder tackle to Punk's back. Burke puts Punk into a surfboard, and no one wins with this move. Punk nearly turns it around, but Burke picks him up into a backbreaker. This gets a two. TWO! And another two. TWO! TWO!

Burke gets frustrated with Scott Armstrong and sends Punk to the ropes chest first to hit a few forearms to the lower lumbar region. This is a slower match than these two normally wrestle. Perhaps it's because they taped Smackdown first and the crowd isn't as hot for ECW as it normally would be.

Burke grabs the arm, steps under and gives Punk a body slam. He goes to grab one leg as Punk hits a few kicks from the laying down position. Punk hits a few more roundhouse kicks followed by a clothesline, a back elbow and finishes the sequence by pancaking Burke. Punk hits a roundhouse to the chest, but only gets a two. TWO!

Punk goes for a suplex and only gets it halfway before Burke turns it into a back suplex and covers Punk for a two. TWO! Punk grabs Burke and plants him with a DDT for another two. TWO!

Punk misses a slow punch and Burke hits a german and can't bridge the back and has to roll around and hook a leg for a two. TWO! After some taunting for Punk to get up he lays into him with some punches and a clothesline or two until Punk reverses it into the GTS. One. Two. Three.

If you've noticed by now, I usually cover Punk's matches move for move, cause usually they're worth noting. It's been a while since he's fought someone he hasn't beaten nearly half a dozen times.

Post match, Tazz and Joey talk up "Big Daddy V", who is up next.

After a long promo for the Cena/Lashley match at the Bash at the Beach, we're finally back. And we're back with out teacher, Matt Striker. He's still Matt Striker, he's still our teacher. Last week he gave the Boogeyman a lesson in redemption. With that, he introduced "Big Daddy V" and once again the only man in the WWE with four boobs comes to ringside. It's a good thing that they keep pushing this young talent.

Big Daddy V over a Red Shirt
SQUASH. Literally.

This just in:

Marcus Cor Von is not at the Smackdown/ECW taping in Laredo, Texas tonight. All references to the scheduled Cor Von vs. CM Punk match have been pulled from WWE.com's ECW on Sci Fi preview as I have been told that match will be changed. No idea yet what may have caused Cor Von to miss the taping. He was in New Orleans at last week's taping, but not utilized. (PWINSIDER.COM)

I wonder what that's all about? I suppose we'll find out soon.

If you are really curious, Big Daddy V's finisher looks to be a Bossman Slam.

The Miz is in the ring and declares himself a chick magnet. I guess they're going with this angle. He says that every woman in the arena wants him. The Miz and I share a problem in this regard. checks dig him and their men fear him. The Miz calls out Extreme Expose, and the Nitro Girls saunter out. Apparently their "surprise" for hte Miz is dancing with him in a chair. The song is "Like A Boy" by Ciara. The Miz looks impressed, the live audience doesn't. Oh, a change, they rip each others shirts off to reveal bras before giving the Miz lap dances. I have a fear that this angle will end with a match between the Expose girls.

Kevin Thorn over Tommy Dreamer by throwing him shoulder first into the post

06/19/07 - Thorn over Dreamer
04/10/07 - Thorn over Dreamer
02/06/07 - Thorn over Dreamer
10/10/06 - Dreamer over Thorn
10/03/06 - Thorn over Dreamer

With a record of 1 for 5, I wonder how this one's gonna go for Dreamer. They lock up and do the brawling thing. Dreamer maintains control and Thorn pulls DDreamer's left shoulder over the ropes and thorn's got control. Wow. Dreamer is selling from last week? That's called SELLING LIKE A CHAMP. Thorn goes after the shoulder more. They go through the usual back and firth between these two, nothing really new here, although Dreamer does pul off a frog splash. Not five star, maybe three stars.

There's a debate going on over matches like this and the CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards match from last week. Personally, I can't really get into a squash match like these, especially when there's a long history of these two going head to head with the same result over and over again. To some degree, the end result doesn't completely ruin the match. For an example, you could look at just about any Hulk Hogan Wrestlemania match, but at the same time, those matches are big league matches and not filler matches on the WWE's "C" show. I don't care how competitive the Punk/Richards match was, the conclusion wasn't going to be different than most of the previous matches.

We cut back to Nitro's locker room and the press agent walks out of the ring and all of the reporters follow him. Wait a second, isn't Nitro giving the press conference?

Rey Mysterio's coming back, did you know?

The press guy is in the ring and is talking about Johnny Nitro's history in the WWE. He's got as much charisma as Lashley in that ring. Johnny Nitro won't be seen in ECW again because...

He's changing his name. Yeah. Changing his name. And his music and look as well. It's the same idea, but more Stillwater in the look. What's Nitro's name going to be?

John Morrison. That's what he says his birth name is.

LIES!!! Although now that I'm looking at him, he's got the Jim Morrison hair going on. Check out John Hennigan's Wikipedia page for more answers on this.

Nitro talks about Punk's nickname for a bit as Punk comes out and Morrison sucker punches Punk and we'll see these two again at the Bash I suppose.

Alright. Let's do this.

LET THE BODIES HIT THE...

Wait a second. OLD SKOOL ECW MUZIK!!! Yeah, that's right, it's the old school music for whatever reason. I suppose they thought that "Let the bodies hit the Floor" was no longer fitting in with the kinder gentler WWE image.

For those of you who care, the iPhone is awesome and totally lives up tot he hype. AT&T isn't great, but the hardware is awesome.

Johnny Nitro over Tommy Dreamer by corkscrew neck breaker
I think we all know how this is gonna end. Nitro hodls up the title to gloat to Dreamer before handing it to someone at ringside. Shame they're turning him into Orton personality wise.

Nitro gets the early advantage over Dreamer, who is looking especially old today. I think it's a change in his hair? Eh, whatever. Nitro keeps control over Nitro, who makes the mistake of going up top once Dreamer is on his feet. Dreamer locks in an abdominal stretch, throwing some forearms into Nitro's abs, which are reaching Lex Luger status as they announce he's only got 4% body fat.

Nitro's strategy finally reveals itself as he's going to target the arm of Dreamer. The crowd cares a bit more about Nitro then I do, as they muster up a weak "Nitro Sucks" chant. Tommy hits a Cactus clothesline and both men are outside, but Dreamer's got the advantage. He throws Nitro in, reminds us all that his arm hurts and teases the suplex to the outside. Nitro drops Dreamer over the top rope and hits him with a drop kick. Dreamer's in pain on the outside and we're heading towards commercials.

We're back and Nitro is still working over the arm and shoulder. Nitro does some damage with three roundhouse kicks to Dreamer's shoulder. Shame I can't remember the dude's finisher, but I hope he wins with something on the arm tonight. Leg drop to the shoulder, but it only gets a two. TWO! Nitro grabs Dreamer, but it only gets a two again. TWO! AGAIN!

Dreamer starts looking a little frustrated and fights back with one arm and Nitro cuts him short with a nice move that I can't name. Nitro's wrestling a picture perfect match in regards to his strategy. He found an opening and kept on it, escalating the moves. Nitro hits a knee drop from the top rope onto Dreamer's shoulder. He held Dreamer under the knee in another impressive move on the shoulder.

Nitro goes for a springboard shining wizard, but Dreamer ducks and hits a clothesline to buy him some time. Nitro charges and Dreamer raises a boot, followed by some punches. Dreamer manages to hit a one armed fall away slam, but that only gets a two. TWO!

Nitro is set up in the tree of woe and gets drilled with a drop kick. Tommy goes for a DDt, but Nitro pulls the arm down and hits the corkscrew neck breaker (oh yeah, that's the move) for a three count. A nice match all in all. Nitro grabs the title and heads to the aisle and does his best facial Randy Orton impression.

A RAW recap sends us off into the commercial break and apparently Lashley vs. Cena is going to headline the Great American Bash. I can only echo the thoughts of GRUT when I say that it might not be the best idea to push someone who is inhuman in physique. And not inhuman in the Khali kinda way. This is in that suspicious kinda way.

Ugh. The Boogeyman gets a video package and now I can't get those moments back in my life. This is followed by a CM Punk video package and.. commercials.

Extreme Expose returns next week. Have you noticed them missing? Me either. Joey say right now they're going to show us the ECW title match from Vengeance. Wait. What? Replaying the video from Vengeance?

Johnny Nitro over CM Punk by swinging neck breaker
Read the original recap at InsidePulse LIVE Vengeance Coverage. How are they going to make this work with all of the mentions of Benoit during this match?

I've got two words for ya: Revisionist History

"WE WANT BENOIT" becomes "ECW".

Here's my thoughts: They've entirely re-dubbed Tazz and Joey and rebuilt the crowd reactions. This is pretty standard practice in the WWE, but usually they won't be so blatant about it as to re-air the match on TV within two weeks. If anyone who saw the original broadcast could back this up or not, please shoot me an e-mail. I know the "BORING" chants are missing besides the "WE WANT BENOIT" chants.

So all in all, there's only 4 wrestlers on the show tonight.

Video promo for the Miz, but we still haven't seen the guy on ECW TV yet. As promised, we're heading into the main event.

CM Punk over Kevin Thorn by a standing enziguiri
Lockup to start and Punk goes behind. Thorn attempts to fight out with some elbows, but Punk ducks out of the way. Thorn eventually connects with a few and Punk is dazed, which leaves him open for a few more vampire punches. Thorn goes for a body slam, but Punk jumps over and sweeps the back of the legs to get Thorn down and hits him with a leg drop quickly. thorn gets up and Punk hits two knees to the chest and a head drag (best name I can think of for it) followed by the roundhouse kick to the back of Thorn. Ow. Punk only gets a two. TWO!

Thorn is up and powers Punk into the corner. Punk is whipped to the opposite corner and Punk jumps over him and chops down the tree with a few roundhouse kicks to the thigh and three to the chest. Punk hits a running knee, but that only gets a one. Punk holds a headlock but is thrown into the ropes by Thorn, he was supposed to go between the ropes, but he hit them instead, which meant thorn had to get him out another way.

On the outside, Thorn powers Punk back first into the barrier and then the ring apron. thorn hits a few times before breaking up the count. On his way back out Punk kicks out the ankle of Thorn to knock him down while on the ring apron. Punk hits a slingshot sommerault senton and were headed to commercials.

We're back and Punk has control of Thorn. Thorn powers out into the corner and hits Punk a few times, then throws him to the other side of the ring. That hasn't worked once tonight, and it still doesn't as Punk attempts to jump over a charging Thorn. Thorn grabs him and dumps him throat first onto the ropes. Thorn hits a double axe handle, but that only gets a one. Perhaps out of frustration, Thorn slaps on a headlock, which gives Punk the opportunity to power out.

Power out he does with a few elbows. Punk runs to the ropes and gets flap jacked followed by a clothesline, but that only gets a two. TWO!

Thorn stretches the back with a knee in Punk's back and pulling back on the chin, as the crowd starts the 80's slow clap for Punk as he powers out and hits some elbows, but Thorn throws Punk to the corner once more and Punk actually lands there, but gets a boot up quick and Thorns face meets boot.

Boot vs. Face. Face rarely wins.

Thorn staggers back and gets another boot to the face. Punk attempts a springboard cross body, but thorn dumps him in the corner instead. Thorn is look a the top turnbuckle and that's no good. He attempts something, but gets knees to the chest. Punk drop toe holds Thorn in the corner and hits his series of strikes and finishes with a flying forearm. A few clotheslines later, Punk goes for ten punches in the corner. He gets to six and sends him to the other corner and hits the rising knee. I really think it'd have a bigger effect on the crowd. He hits the bulldog, but only gets a two. TWO!

Punk goes up top, but Thorn stops that and Thorn attempts Original Sin, but Punk gets out of it and pulls Thorn's back across the ropes. {Punk hits a springboard flying forearm, but that only gets a two. TWO!

Punk is frustrated, and this time he attempts a Go to Sleep, but thorn elbows out and hits a clothesline. Thorn looks for a crucifix, but Punk hits a standing enziguiri for the three count!

Nitro comes out to distract Punk, Thorn attacks from behind. Punk battles back as Nitro gets to the ring, but Nitro avoids Punk and taunts him with the title.

Would have been nice to have a different match besides the Vengeance one tonight. You have to wonder why they would air that match rather than a live one. I suppose that maybe they're trying to show what happened in the new post Benoit WWE, but that could have been accomplished with a recap or music video rather than the entire match being shown.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have some cupcakes to frost.

Originally posted at Inside Pulse.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

Send me some feedback here.


It's Tuesday once more and we've already got a new music video with heavy emphasis on CM Punk.

The World title is shown as Joey explains we've got two matches to determine who will wrestle for said title. It's Punk vs. Cor Von and Benoit vs. Burke. They've got new graphics for the matchups and Joey and Tazz have to bring the mood down as the crowd starts to get hot for ECW. Instead of using some momentum. This leads to a video recapping McMahoon and they return and the crowd is DEAD. Way to go guys.

Chris Benoit over Elijah Burke by Sharpshooter
He's back in ECW, baby! He's serious as usual. Burke doesn't look too happy to be fighting Benoit. He shouldn't be either, he's fighting CHRIS FUCKING BENOIT. Burke pauses at ringside to admire the gold.

Collar and elbow to start and Benoit goes behind and gets a waistlock takedown. Burke fights out into a front chancery, but Benoit takes the arm and puts Burke down with a hammer lock. Burke gets up in the lock and throws some elbows back to break the hold.

Burke grabs a headlock, but Benoit sends him into the corner. Burke puts up the knees to block Benoit and goes for a clothesline that's reversed into a crossface attempt. Burke turns through , pulls out the legs and rolls through for a one count. This leads to a staredown.

Benoit hits some nasty chops before Burke ducks through and rolls him up for a small two. Benoit grabs the crossface but Burke is in the ropes. Benoit goes for the test of strength but gets booted in the guy instead. Benoit goes to the corner and gets a chop and Burke gets a a few punches in. Burke sends Benoit to the other corner and Benoit goes chest first. Burke goes for a pin but only gets a two count. TWO!

Burke reports to some kicks and eventually punches on his knees to Benoit but still can't more than a two. TWO!

Burke hits a kick to the ribs when Benoit's getting up for some crowd head. Burke goes for an abdominal stretch on the ground, but Benoit powers out and Benoit turns a front chancery into a northern lights suplex for a two. TWO!

Burke's up quick and boots Benoit in the back of the head. Burke lifts Benoit up for a suplex but drops him across the ropes and knocks him to the floor. Burke throws Benoit into the ring and goes for an awkward pin but only gets a one count. Burke goes for the Elijah Experience against the ropes, but Benoit mvoes out of the way. Benoit hits some forearms, followed by a high elbow and a textbook snap suplex with a float over for two. TWO! Next is a northern lights suplex for two. TWO! Next on the suplex world tour is the trio of germans and Benoit signals for the headbutt. He's up top but Burke gets his knees up and knees Benoit! Referee Armstrong starts the double count down and both men are up at seven. Burke gets a judo takedown and goes for a pin but gets a two. TWO!

Burke gets frustrated and throws some punches, followed by a suplex attempt of his own, but Benoit throws some knees to Burke in mid air. Benoit goes for more Germans, but Burke blocks them. Benoit gets a leg takedown and goes for the Sharpshooter, but Burke kicks out of it. Benoit goes to the corner as Burke gets up and akes down his kneepads. The elijah Express is avoided by Benoit and Burke is down. Benoit grabs the legs and goes for the Sharpshooter, this time getting is and BENOIT WINS! We're gonna see Benoit fight for the title at Vengeance. Sweet.

Did you see RAW? Maybe you shouldn't bother anymore if you're going to watch ECW. They show Stephanie's full of shit speech on RAW. Kudos to the crowd to pull out the "WHAT" chant at this shit. Next week's RAW is going to be a three hour celebration of Vince McMahon. Fuck me, that's gonna be painful. Steph's still lamenting the man who suggested that he go on TV with an incest angle with her.

This crap is broken up with the Boogeyman's music. Great.

Boogeyman over Sean Alexander by sportz entertainemnt
I barely got his name typed when Boogeyman wont he match with one move. One move that he screwed up the first attempt at. He does the two handed choke slam into a spine buster move. blah blah blah. I've already said too much about this match.

We're shown a clip from Daniel Beck the "federal investigator" from the McMahon investigation.

Kevin Thorn over Tommy Dreamer by reversal in the corner and Dreamer's possibly injured
I know that were using a smaller roster on this show, but couldn't we get a different match up besides these two going one on one?

Anyone else notice these guys have the same body? Well, I'm sure that Thorn's back is fully functional. They go back and forth with some wrestling trading holds until Thorn finally hits what looks like a Rock Bottom into a spine buster. Thorn goes for some boots then wrenches in a headlock on Dreamer ion the ground, then goes for some spine stomping. Back to the head wrenching and the crowd is chanting for... tables?

Thorn keeps control until he goes for something in the corner and Dreamer plants Thorn's head into the turnbuckle. Dreamer hits a bulldog but misses the DDT, instead he hits a spinebuster and goes for the pin. TWO!

Ah the spinebuster pin, the pin with the least amount of leverage EVER. Tommy goes for the ten punches in the corner but only gets as far as three before Thorn ducks under and knocks his feet out. Dreamer snags his left ankle on the ropes and grasps it as Thorn runs over and gets a three count.

And because we can't go a segment without showing more of this McMahon crap, we get AN OTHER replay of Vince's limo blowing up. Man, the destroy one car and they need to milk it for all it's worth. In the olden days they'd destroy cars and barely have one replay before moving on to something else. How come in this whole investigation no one's questioned why there was two cameramen setup outside the arena while the show was still going on? Hmm?

Next up is Johnny Nitro, who I am mad at because he stole my abs.

Johnny Nitro over Nunzio by a new finishing maneuver
You know that his time in ECW is over when he's back to Nunzio and has shed Little Guido once more. Each minute this match goes, it's one less minute that we're going to get Cor Von vs. CM Punk.

If you really wanna know about the match, Nunzio's gotta be the one pacing this one as it's full of hope spots cut short by power moves. Nitro finishes it up with a new spinning finisher.

Backstage MCV is talking to Burke, but tells him that he's gonna beat CM Punk and go on to Vengeance to win the title. Hey.... it's possible. They're teasing tension between Burke and Cor Von going into this match. An interesting way to go into the match.

We're given about 20 seconds of the Miz. Long enough for me to HATE HIM. That's followed by Extreme Expose talking. TALKING? BROOKE IS TALKING? BOOOOO. Brook wants to be hooked up with him. Layla says that Kelly was with the Miz last weekend. Didn't the Miz hate Layla? Didn't Layla make the Miz lap dance the fat oily guy? OMG! DRAMA IN THE EXPOSE!

CM Punk over Marcus Cor Von by GTS
The one thing that annoys me that they're doing lately is when they put a commercial in the middle of a match or in between the entrances. We're back and CM Punk hits the ring. Punk admires the belt before the match and we're on.

Punk throws forearms to MCv. MCV comes back with a clothes line and pounds Punk while he's down a bit. ship into the corner that's reversed into a cross body for a one count. MCV gets arm dragged around and Punk segues into a pin for a one and he's got the arm in a hammer lock. MCV powers out with some punches to the side. MCV misses a clothes line, MCV goes behind, but Punk gets him in a firemans carry and dumps him while he's still on his knees. That gets a one and Punk puts the boots to MCV.Punk goes for a backslide but can't get it. MCV hist the Stroke on Punk and continues the work on the shoulder of Punk. MCV puts the arm behind and throws Punk to the corner post. MCV goes outside the ring to throw Punk's arm to the post a bit more. MCV comes back in and Punk is waiting with some kicks and forearms. MCV gets a hammer lock and Punk goes to the floor with it. MCV pins Punk with a half nelson, but only a two. TWO!

MCV stays on the arm, Punk goes behind but can only get a two on a roll up. TWO! And Punk drops him with a clothesline. MCV keeps on the arm in a hammer lock as Punk's got MCV's head. Punk jumps back and flips over MCV and runs off the ropes and attempts a cross body. He's caught and MCV gets a fall away slam (Tazz says it's also called a table top suplex) and Cor Von goes back to working the arm.

MCV goes for smoething in the corner but is met with a knee. Punk fights back one armed and hits a kick to the head and then the rising knee lift followed by the bulldog. Punk goes to the top and goes for a cross body, but instead MCV turns him for a SNAP powerslam. Damn that was nasty. Punk's limp and MCV hits a double underhook suplex and Punk's out on his feet. MCV goes for a shouldblock in the corner and meets the turnbuckle, followed by the Go to Sleep! CM PUNK VS BENOIT! NICE!!!

Benoit's music hits and we're gonna have our first staredown between these two. Five days out form the PPV we need at least one of these. Punks got the height, but by no more than than two inches. Benoit offers a hand and Punk shakes it. We're looking at the match of the night on Sunday bewteen these two.

Originally posted at Inside Pulse.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

Send me some feedback here. Alright, I don't think McMahon's dead, he faked his own death to get people to appreciate him more. Now that I got that out of the way, let's talk about a wrestling show. Entertaining the idea that Vince Mcmahon is dead is idiotic. Even WWE.com was playing this thing up. The WWE is a publicly traded company, there would be a whole hell of a lot more press on this if it were true.

So what else happened? I got my wish. Bobby Lashley is no longer the champion and no longer on the show. The title is vacated and we're gonna find out what's going on about it tonight, hopefully. Perhaps we'll even see ECW get a GM. In other news, despite how good Chris Benoit is, he's never going to be as good as Lashley is because in his last match as ECW champion, he beat the new guy on the roster. That new guy was Chris Benoit. Speaking of the new guy, ECW gets the Boogeyman! Why not just draft some toast instead? They have the same ability in the ring. The odds are 3:2 that the Boogeyman interrupts Extreme Expose tonight. I'm gonna miss SNITSKY.

And the show starts...

So the show actually started with a talk about Vince's "death" and a recap from last night. I hate this angle so much. This is about one man's ego. It's amazing that Vince can book his own "death" and then make his contracted talent mourn him while he directs them to do so. How much air time can this guy take up? Loads. They're not even recapping, they're showing the show the whole thing again. As if it wasn't long and drawn out enough the first time, it's brutal the second time.

What's going to be painful is when we find out that ECW's rating spiked because of this garbage. Then the WWE office will get the idea that this kinda crap is okay. This isn't the RAW Rewind, it is its own damn brand of the WWE.

It's 10:08 and the show hasn't really started yet. Joey and Tazz say that there will be more footage shown and tonight will be a series of matches dedicated to Vince's memory. Then they disgrace every bell ringing they've ever had on the show with the bell tolling on TV. The live crowd is shitting all over it, and for good reason. The Philly crowd isn't going to stand for this crap and I applaud them for it. Fade to black on the angry crowd.

The moment I see someone wearing an armband, I'm gonna be pissed. At least we're gonna get some rasslin tonight, right?

Tommy Dreamer over Balls Mahoney by DDT on a chair
Nice matchup if you're gonna have a fluff show. Tommy starts off with some wrestling, bad idea as Balls goes into the punches quick. Dreamer blocks the last one in favor of some of his own punches, which ends in a suplex by Balls. Balls goes for a leg whip, but Dreamer ducks and Balls goes outside.

Tommy introduces Balls to the announce table and then pulls out a garbage pail and the kitchen sink. Dreamer goes for the sink once but Balls ducks, but the second one hits. Balls gets up and sends Dreamer into the stairs and Balls goes for the weapons. Another trash can and a trash lid. Both men make their way into the ring and Dreamer takes a few shows with the trash lid. If this night is a proper tribute to Vince, all the matches would end with outside interference, weapons, family members and retired wrestlers making the save.

Back to the action, Tommy hits Balls with the trash can a few times. Dreamer goes outside for a chair and sets it up in the middle of the ring. Tommy goes for a suplex over the chair, but it's blocked and instead Dreamer gets drop toe held into the chair, which was ass side down and legs up.

Balls goes for a moonsault, but is cut short and Dreamer puts him into the Tree of Woe, and gets the trash can drop kicked into his face. The announcers are talking about how this is the best tribute to McMahon. You mean having matches with wrestlers he hated in a style that he hated is a fitting tribute? When I die, make sure that Nazi's march across my front lawn. That's my tribute according to their standards. More garbage can shots to Dreamer and Balls has a table in the ring. Dreamer is lying face down on the table and Balls goes for a leg drop and misses, going through the table. Dreamer drops Balls with a DDT for the win.

Looks like the main event is gonna be Punk and Benoit vs. the New Breed, but before then, it's the Boogeyman! BOOGEYMAN=RATINGS!

Here's an example of if the world takes this whole Vince angle seriously. The WWE stock dropped a QUARTER today. Not a 25% drop, but a $0.25 drop.

The Boogeyman over Matt Striker by Sportz Entertainment
So they send out Striker to job to the Boogeyman? I don't normally give star ratings, but I feel confident about this one. DUD. Post match Striker gets a mouthful of worms. Poor Striker.

For those of you who never watched Smackdown and haven't seen a Boogeyman match before, what you just saw was the height of his wrestling ability.

Okay, so now we get the "after RAW went off the air" footage. What I don't get is that if this footage was really exclusive to WWE.com, wouldn't it not be on television. If footage of firefighters putting out a fire interests you, then the WWE has some footage for you! If you tuned in to see a wrestling show, then I've got some bad news. This whole scene has taken up fifteen minutes of the show. Joey and Tazz lament some more before saying that the main event is up next.

How tasteful of the WWE to have a promo for the "Do or Die" match back to back with the Vince "death" footage.

Elijah Burke and Marcus Cor Von vs. Chris Benoit and CM Punk
How do I know they're killing time? All four guys get their entrances. CM Punk and MCV start it out. Collar and elbow to start, Punk gets a headlock, MCV attempts to fight out but is taken over still with Punk's headlock. ON the ground, MCV turns Punk for a one count. MCV fights up and nearly gets out with a few punches before Punk throws some knees and goes behind MCV with a hammer lock. MCV ducks under and puts a headlock on Punk. Punk fights out with an elbow and throws MCV to the ropes. MCV over powers punch with a shoulder block and taunts Punk to get up. Punk gets up and both men stare down.

Another collar and elbow and Punk drags MCV over and we've got another stare down. MCV goes for a kick while Punk goes for another lockup. MCV wins. MCV has Punk's head and tags out to Burke. MCV clubs Punk's back and opens Punk up to a punch in the ribs by Burke. Punk comes back with some punches, but gets kneed in the face and gets a two. TWO!

Both men are up and Burke gets a hammer lock on Punk. Punk reverses it and throws Burke over, holding an arm bar. Some short shoulders and followed by a tag to Benoit. Burke backs off while Benoit is.... Benoit. Benoit punches a bit, then whips Burke to the ropes and nails a clothesline. Benoit hits a snap suplex for two. TWO!

MCV is tagged in and MCV hits some punches, Benoit gets a chop in, but is thrown to the ropes by MCV and attacks on his way back capitalizing on MCV going for a back body drop. Benoit gets some punches and chops in in the corner before MCV fights out and turns the tables on Benoit. MCV takes him out of the corner and ships him into the ropes, but with the same result as before. Benoit tags in Punk.

Punk come sin with a springboard clothesline and follows it with some quick kicks. Punk sends MCV into the corner and hits the knee lift. The bulldog is blocked, but Punk hits a running kick to send MCV out of the ring. Behind Punk's back Burke comes in, but is cut off by a Benoit clothesline. A FIERCE Benoit clothesline. This leaves the faces in the ring and we go to commercial.

We're back and Punk gets a jawbreaker to break up a headlock by Burke. Burke hits an elbow on Punk's head and follows it up with some more elbows. Burke stares down Benoit and goes back to Punk. MCV is tagged in and goes to work with some forearms on Punk's back in the heel corner. MCV pulls Punk to the ring and hits some punches as Punk is on his knees in the middle of the ring. MCV can only get a two. TWO!

Punk is whipped to the heel corner and is charged by MCV, who tags in Burke. Punk comes back or a clothesline on Burke, but is knocked down quick and hits some forearms to Punks head from above him. MCV is tagged in as Punk is hurtin. MCV throws Punk into the corner, but Punk reverses and goes for ten punches in the corner. That's ended quick by MCV with a powerbomb, but that only gets a two. TWO!

Punk gets catapulted into the corner and then stomped by MCV. MCV goes for something, but Punk gets an inside cradle for two. TWO!

Punk goes to tag Benoit, but MCV hits Benoit, who charges into the ring and distracts Brad Armstrong for a moment. MCV tags Burke. Who whips Punk into MCV, who dumps him in the corner. The ref signals for the bell? What the hell?

How did I say a fitting tribute to Vince would go? Shoddy endings? There you have it. It would have been a little more fitting if it was a handicapped match or involved God as a tag team partner, but I suppose that'd be overkill for one match, right?

Benoit comes in and it's BONZO GONZO. Punk hits an enzguiri on MCV and Benoit hits the Germans on Burke, followed by the flying headbutt and the Sharpshooter. Burke taps out, but the match was already over. There's no explanation given as to why, but Joey clarifies that it's because MCV was in the ring past the five count. Everyone stares everyone else down, and we're pulled back to RAW for some reason to watch Mr. McMahon die once more.

If you want to watch it frame for frame, you can see the edit when Vince closes the door. There was no plastic shield in front of the camera in the before shot and it suddenly appears in the after shot. Not that anyone believes that Vince is dead. Because he's not.

The show ends the exact same way that RAW did. Crappy.

Originally posted at Inside Pulse.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

So Rob Van Dam is gone and Bobby Lashley is the champion. This is the last stop before the draft lottery on Monday and it "all begins again".

We're starting tonight with a recap of the street fight where Bobby Lashley reclaimed the ECW heavyweight title. No need to get the replay, they pretty much just showed all the high spots of the match.

Let the bodies hit the floor. You know, with such a dwindling roster, there is only so many wrestlers for them to highlight.

Okay, Vince is on a rocking chair on a platform next to the entrance. Old man Vince gets intro-d, but just sits there catatonic. Maybe Trish gave him the same pills she used to give Linda? That would require Trish to be with the company.

Lashley's music hits and he makes his way out to the ring with old man Vince looking on from his rocking chair. I really thought that maybe we'd get to see Lashley move on to someone else, rather than have this feud continue even further.

So what could be something that would immediately ruin my night? Lashley speaking on the mic? Nope. Try a 3 on 1 hardcore handicapped match with Lashley on one side and Dreamer, Sandman and Balls on the other side. This will clearly show that Lashley has no real competition on the show and that Vince is better than any of the ECW Originals because he can beat Lashley.

Bobby Lashley over the Three Stooges
The ORiginals start with weapon shots, and Lashley leaves the ring and attempts to come back in, only to get attacked by the three stooges once more. Lashley can't get into the ring without getting assaulted by the Originals.

Dreamer hints the Holly suplex out the ring, but it's reversed, as would be expected. Next Lashley takes down Sandman and gets caned by Balls, followed by a double suplex by Balls and Dreamer.

Lashley throws Dreamer into the steps and I think the crowd is super confused by now. Aside from Punk, this is just about all of the faces on the show. Sandman hits a guillotine leg drop as Lashley's draped over the middle rope, but Sandman can only get a two. TWO!

Lashley goes into the tree of woe as the crowd chants for tables. Lashley takes a drop kick through a chair to the face and the crowd is cheering for the Originals kicking this guy's ass. Sandman gets a table as Balls has a chair and goes for Lashley, but instead gets Dreamer. Whoops. Balls goes after Lashley with the chair and hits the mark/head, but missed a second turnbuckle leg drop. Lashley picks up Sandman and puts him through a table standing up in the corner and spears Balls Mahoney.

Don't worry everyone. The draft lottery will fix ALL of this next week. They'll move anyone who has anything to do with the Original ECW off the show and move a bunch of monsters to ECW to slowly plod through the hour of television. Let's forge that Lashley just took out three wrestlers, and three wrestlers that were being pushed not too long ago.

Post match, Lashley goes up to old man Vince's platform and celebrates with the title a bit. This whole catatonic thing doesn't work very well, considering we saw him fine last night on RAW talking and walking around.

Maybe this will change the direction of the show now that Vince has to actually sit and watch it, just like we watch it. He looks about as bored as he should for watching this show.

Joey reminds us that this could be the end of the ECW roster as we know it.

Kevin Thorn over Stevie Richards by Original Sin
Poor Stevie. During the match we're reminded that Thorn follows vampires and frequent bite clubs. It's like they're trying to introduce the character again. I hate to break it to the WWE, but ECW isn't attracting any new viewers. The show doesn't go much under a 1.3 and it doesn't go over a 1.6 in the ratings.

I'm not going to give you any idea as to what kind action transpired during the match. It doesn't matter anyway. When I say "Stevie Richards", you should add "loses" to that statement.

Okay, so we're going to get a recap of what Randy Orton did to Rob Van DAm, which is put him out of commission until his contract is up. But before then, it's time for Extreme Expose, who is dancing to a Pitbull song. Pitbull? Wasn't that guy on My Super Sweet 16? I think Layla was hotter with straight hair.

As promised, we get a recap of Rob Van Dam vs. Randy Orton, so for everyone who didn't see it, you can see the move that took out RVD. RVD takes a pretty good DDT, I'll say that much. So as expected, RVD put over Randy Orton on his way out despite winning the match.

Joey and Tazz act all solemn about RVD's "injury" before we move on to Marcus Cor Von and Elijah Burke's entrance. Before moving on, were reminded that the Major Brothers beat Striker and Cor Von the last time they met.

The New Breed over The Major Brothers by Pounce.
Okay, so I can't tell the difference between the Major Brothers. One of them starts with MCV, and gets their ass handed to them for a while. MCV misses a punch and Major gets a an arm bar, tags out and the otherMajor gets an axe han dle onto MCV's arm. Another quick tag, but MCV goes to Burke, but he gets put into an arm bar too. Quick tag by the majors, double leapfrog, then a double arm drag, but that only draws a two. TWO!

Burke gets a headlock, but Major powers out of it and throws Burke to the ropes. Burke dumps Major from an attempted leap frog behind him and can only get a two. TWO!

Burke drags Major back to the heel corner and tags in MCV, who continues the punishment. MCV gets a few kicks to the ribs in on Major before taking his head off with a short clothesline. Burke gets tagged in and hits his corner twist elbow move, whatever the name of it might be. Burke applied some torque to Major's head before going to a european uppercut. MCV is tagged back in and puts a bear hug on Major. I think it's Brett. Brett powers out with elbows, but gets a knee to the midsection after running to the ropes. MCV brings him back to the heel corner and Burke is tagged in. Burke slaps on an abdominal stretch, and these two guys get a breather.

Brett powers out with a hip toss and gets kneed in the back and Brett tags in Brian, who clears house. Brian hits a spinebuster, but Burke gets a shoulder up on two. TWO!

Brian gets POOOUUNNNNCEEEEE-d and gets the three count.

Okay, so the McChair from earlier is empty, and we're reminded what happened about 45 minutes ago with the Lashley vs. ECW Originals match.

Alright, it's main event time after they promote the WWE RAW energy drink that's only available at Wal Mart. I used to love energy drinks, but I can't imagine this one being remotely good. It's the Socko company, so that's Bischoff's company.

CM Punk over Matt Striker by GTS
Striker's got a mic, who calls himself Punk's teacher before the match starts. Punk acknowledges the CM PUNK chant the crowd's got going before the match really starts. Punk whips STriker to the ropes and hits a kick to the head, followed by one to the back. Punk goes for more kicks.... and hits them.

Punk throws Striker back and forth until Striker hits a back elbow and throws Punk to the corner and hits some kicks of his own. They go back and forth some more and Striker eventually hits a northern lights suplex. Striker continues the punishment.

Striker's got some odd american flag tights on, but he can't get Punk in a Boston crab. He eventually gets it, but releases it for a splash n Punk's back. Striker goes for a single leg crab and the crowd gets behind Punk. Punk gets out of the hold by going for punches to the back.

Punk goes for the GTS, but he can't get it as Striker's holding the ropes. Striker gets Punk's feet on the top rope and hits a swinging neck breaker. Nice move. Striker goes back to the single leg crab and Punk eventually powers his way to the ropes. STriker went for a third crab, but Punk rolls him up for two.. TWO!

Punk hits his set of three strikes and hits some kicks to the top of the head, followed by the rising knee in the corner and the bulldog, but only gets a two. TWO!

Punk goes for GTS again, but Striker counters with a punch in the face. Punk manages to get the move and the main event ends pretty much how everyone thought it would with a GTS.

---

Originally posted at Inside Pulse.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

There's wrestling on tonight? Sorry, things are a bit hazy since I bought a Wii yesterday. I hope everyone had a nice Memorial Day weekend, if you're a Sirius subscriber, you missed an awesome day on their metal channel which saluted those in metal who have died before their time.

Meanwhile, we're going to turn our attention to ECW, the second most popular cable wrestling show. It's all headed towards change as we're headed towards another draft. Enough injuries have plagued the rosters where they're finally going to shuffle things up a bit. It's a good thing for the rosters of the three shows, but it's a bad thing for the live crowds. I was in Boston for the Smackdown following Wrestlemania XX, a few days before the draft lottery and the whole show sucked. All I can remember is the World's Greatest Tag Team faced off against each other and Farooq was fired. I also remember it being horribly boring.

So who caught the RVD match last night? Did anyone else think it was funny to hear Jim Ross talking about RVD wanting a legacy like HBK's on what might be the last RAW he's going to appear on? Did anyone else find it funny that it was one guy who they can't keep in the company and one guy they don't want in the company fighting each other? Seems like the Goodwill Tour of 2007 is more like the Farewell Tour of 2007. For those of you who missed RAW, check out the Monday Night RAW coverage elsewhere on Wrestling Pulse.

Did you read the ECW preview for tonight? A DISCUSSION BETWEEN LASHLEY AND VINCE! There's nothing quite like a good discussion on a wrestling show. These two guys haven't gotten to say everything that they're going to do to each other yet, so let's give them that opportunity. I bought a Nintendo Wii and I'm not playing it tonight because, gash darn it, I want to see a discussion. Do you know what title match had a worse lead up than this? Scott Steiner vs. Triple H. Unending boring handicapped matches and discussions are up there with a bench pressing competition, arm wrestling and a pushup competition.

There was some talk in making

Anyway, let's keep up the mediocre at best wrestling programming.

We're starting with the usual crowd panning, which is interrupted by Randy Orton's music. Orton crashes my party and they're gonna give him a microphone. You know what's worse than a Randy Orton match? A Randy Orton promo. He's pretty sure he's not welcome in ECW after what he did to RVD. I'm pretty sure that he's now welcome because of how much of my time he's taken from my life being on my television set on a regular basis.

This segues into a recap video of the RVD vs. Randy Orton match from last night. I wonder why Smackdown gets to be it's own entity, but ECW is constantly being invaded by RAW talent. I wish I could fast forward these video packages.

Orton does his usual lifeless stare at the video screen and continues his scripted promo talking about how everything he did happened in a match and how they have a stretcher match. That's a shame. They're putting Orton over RVD in a stretcher match on what's supposed to be an ECW show one year after Rob Van Dam helped start the new ECW.

Tommy Dreamer decides to crash the party because he's in Tommy's house of ECW. Tommy challenges Orton to a match, and that draws a little bit of heat from the crowd. Apparently the crowd forgot that Tommy Dreamer doesn't win his matches.

Either Orton's gotten smaller or he's wearing a sport jacket that REALLY doesn't fit him, as he looks like an awkward teenager out in the ring. Randy finishes up by saying he's going to kill the legend of ECW. Tommy looks at him like he's an idiot, because come on, Vince started to kill it a year ago and it's already all but dead.

Have you seen the One Night Stand match listing? I think they would have done better to not announce anything besides the main events, because this look bad. A pudding match? Good thing it's not a title match or else that would violate the integrity of the women's division.

Wait a second. An arm wrestling match at Saturday Night's Main Event? Didn't I just make the comparison to Steiner vs. Triple H?

Elijah Burke over C.M. Punk in a no DQ match by a POOOUUUNNNCCCEEEE into a table
Let's get on to the wrestling match of the week. These guys don't get the main event this week for some reason. Maybe cause the champion's actually going to appear on the show.

Burke and Punk lock up and are evenly matches. Punk gets a headlock and wrenches it in and goes around for a hammer lock. Burke reverses it with a leg scissors and tries for his own arm bar but it's reversed into another hammer lock. Punk drops some knees on the arm as he's got it, then goes for some short shoulder blocks and kicks. The idiot crowd starts chanting for tables because they're involved in a tables match. Jackals.

Burke takes control with yet another hammer lock and Punk goes under and around and once again has Burke in... a hammer lock. Burke fights out with some back elbows, but it's cut short by Punk with a kick to the face. Burke goes to the corner and attempts to hold on to the ropes, but Punk pulls him up and Burke lands against the canvas back first.

Punk takes Burke down and gives him a roundhouse to the back, but that pissed Burke off (and probably hurt a whole lot too. No way to gimmick a round kick like that). Burke pops up and goes for some kicks and punches, but is met with some of Punk's kicks instead. Punk takes his time getting to Burke and gets punched in the gut for waiting. Burke whips Punk into the corner , but is met with an elbow and a cross body block from the second turnbuckle. Punk gets a few back elbows in and clotheslines Burke over the top rope to the floor.

Burke throws a temper-tantrum outside and tries to bring a chair into the ring but instead he gets it kicked it into his gut. Ow.

We're back and Burke's got a bear hug on Punk. During the break, Burke picked up Punk and sent him back first into the post outside of the ring. Punk attempts to power out but gets driven into the corner instead. Burke gets some strikes in before going to a choke. Burke gets a springboard elbow on Punk in the corner and can only draw a two. TWO!

Burke goes back to the the bear hug because they're friends. Burke clubs the back a bit as Punk refuses to submit. Instead he's summoning the power of the Punkamaniacs. Punk rolls up Burke, but can only get a two. TWO!

Punk's face s met with a punch from the ground as Burke takes back control. Elijah gloats a bit before trying a pin twice, but only draws a two. TWO!

Burke tries mouthing off to the ref, thinks better of it and goes instead to punch Punk in the stomach. After some more rib torture, Burke goes for the table, to the delight of the idiots in the audience. The table's set up in the corner and Punk rolls up Burke for a two. TWO!

Punk blocks some strikes and gets some in of his own. He's got full control after a NICE enziguiri. That only gets a two though.

TWO!

Punk knees Burke in the face a few times and we get a triple irish whip reversal into the opposite corner from the table, followed by a rising knee from Punk, then the bulldog is reversed into a belly to back suplex. Punk's hurting and Burke is slow to get up. Punk's on the ring apron and pulls Burke's throat down onto the ropes. Punk then MISSES A SPOT BY A MILE AND A HALF. I don't know what he was trying to do, but he wound up falling off the top turnbuckle like a sack of shit and landing at the feet of Burke instead.

Hey, someone's gotta take Sabu's place, right?

Burke covers and buys Punk two second to regain some composure as the crowd bathes him in what I can recall as his first "you fucked up" chant. Whoops. Burke pulls Punk back up as Joey and Tazz make excuses. Punk gets up and hits his strikes and Punk has Burke ready fora GTS, but it's interrupted by Marcus Cor Von and a chair. Punk fights off Cor Von, eventually hitting him with the chair and as Punk goes to put Burke through a table, Burke turns around and kicks him in the ribs.

Burke goes for a body slam but Punk's eyes get raked and as he's recovering he gets hit with the POOOUUUNNNNCCCEEEEEE into the table. Cor Von celebrates like he just got out of his TNA contract and Punk is out as Burke covers him for the three count. What a good match.

We're back. Woo hoo. Vince is somewhere besides being in front of the crowd. Vince takes the opportunity to make fun of Joey's use of the name "Joey" saying that he sounds like he's 12 years old. Vince then takes the time to make fun of Tazz' name, saying he sounds like a medieval gargoyles. Then he makes the comparison that Lashley's name starts with an L and so does "loser". They exchange pleasantries and Vince starts to interview Lashley. Lashley's confident about this weekend.

Vince wants to know what makes Lashley tick. Lashley says it's having his title.

Do you really want me to comment on this? Here are some talking points.

- Vince is from the streets
- Vine is gonna show Lashley why his name is "Mr. McMahon"
- Lashley will hurt Vince
- Lashley has shiny white teeth

Holy cow. Stupid doesn't even begin to describe that. If you find it on YouTube, send them a takedown notice on the grounds that it's a waste of storage space and bandwidth.

Remember that video package we already saw of Rob Van Dam and Orton's match? Well, in case you missed it the first time, here's a repeat. And because the WWE thinks it's okay to use the same thing twice, I do too.

This segues into a recap video of the RVD vs. Randy Orton match from last night. I wonder why Smackdown gets to be it's own entity, but ECW is constantly being invaded by RAW talent. I wish I could fast forward these video packages.

Extreme expose is dancing to a Nelly Furtado song. Once again Kelly is behind the other two girls. I wonder where she learned to dance. Carmen Elektra?

Kevin Thorn over Balls Mahoney by Original Sin without breaking a sweat
Thorn looks like he's lost weight. Like 120 lbs of it. The crowd remembers who Balls Mahoney is, which is a positive thing. You'd think that these two would be on the same page.

Thorn gets some punches to start, but it cut off by Balls, but Thorn quickly takes control again. Thorn throws Balls through the turnbuckles into the post and Balls cries like a little girl about it. Balls is met by a spine buster and then the Original Sin for the three count. It's like this isn't the same Balls Mahoney that they brought in to One Night Stand last year to be put over Masato Tanaka. Well, it is, but now you can see the influence one man (Paul Heyman) can have over one show.

Backstage the Major Brothers are talking about RVD, when Matt Striker interrupts. He knows that they have first names and he gives it a try incorrectly naming them both. He knows their names, I haven't cared to learn them yet. Striker lays some vocabulary down on the Major Brothers before pumping the draft once again. Striker throws down a challenge for the Major Brother he hasn't yet beat in singles competition. Which one? I'm not sure.

Randy Orton over Tommy Dreamer by RKO
They start the match with some collar and elbow action that goes nowhere besides a few headlocks. Tommy can't win a shoulder block competition and goes for a headlock of his own. Tommy gets a headlock to the face and Randy can't suplex him back over the ropes, but instead drops his throat on them and drop kicks him to the floor.

Dreamer's back in and Orton's back to the headlock. Orton goes to the top, but can't get a move in and instead he gets superplexed by Dreamer. Dreamer gets some punches in and drops Randy to his knees and knocks him down a few times until Randy reverses a whip and goes for a drop kick but Tommy holds onto the ropes and Randy falls flat. Tommy rolls through for a two. TWO!

I've never understood why missing a drop kick is sop bad in the first place. It's not as if you're not already going to fall on the ground when you're done anyway. Oh well. Dreamer hits a bulldog and a spine buster but can only get a two. TWO!

Dreamer puts Orton in the tree of woe and hits a drop kick followed by an inverted DDT that only draws a two. TWO!

Orton hits an RKO out of nowhere and that's the match.

Orton hits another RKO because one wasn't enough and Dreamer is struggling to get to his feet. Orton goes for the running boot to the head but backs down for some reason. We wait a minute and Orton hits it anyway. This draws RVD out to the ring and he gets hit in the head, which drops him quick to the mat. The crowd chants for RVD as Orton's music hits and the show ends on a huge anticlimactic ending.

Originally posted at Inside Pulse.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

So we've got a Pay Per View in two weeks. Did anyone remember that? Probably not or else we wouldn't wind up with Judgement Day rematches. After John Cena beat Khali in a pretty clean fight, who wants to see them fight again anyway. Hell, who wanted to see them fight in the first place?

We're live on SciFi in Iowa. Joey reminds us we're two weeks why of One Night Stand 3 and RVD will wrestle tonight! I guess those rumors of him being done in ECW are bunk.

SNITSKY makes his way out and Joey says he thinks "evil" the first thing he sees when he sees SNITSKY. My first thought is CHEEKS. Tonight's sacrificial lamb is Tommy Dreamer.

SNITSKY happens to Tommy Dreamer by Big Boot
SNITSKY overpowers Dreamer, quuickly throwing him over the top rope to the floor. SNITSKY brings him back in and Dreamer acts like he's been in an hour long brawl with Raven or something. I guess everyone gets older. SNITSKY throws him through the ropes into the corner post and SNITSKY gets Dreamer's arm in an hammer lock around the ropes. SNITSKY gets Dreamer in a front chancery and follows it up with a body slam, but misses the leg drop and misses the big boot and gets crotched. Dreamer has an opportunity and takes it with some kicks to get SNITSKY down on his knees. Dreamer gets a short DDT but it only gets a two. TWO!

Dreamer comes back with some kicks and weak clubbing blows and gives SNITSKY a boot to the face in the corner. He tries for something off the second turnbuckle, but he gets cut short with a nasty clothesline and a big boot to get a three count. Post match SNITSKY continues to attack Dreamer, but RVD comes out to make the save and a hits a long Van Daminator. More Rob Van Dam in the angle? Well I'll be damned. I was gonna put the odds at 3:1 that we never saw Rob Van Dam again.

We get a recap of Judgement Day ECW's title match. Blah blah blah, Lashley wins, but doesn't win the title.

Apparently we're going to see the Timbaland video tonight. So instead of the Condemned we're going to see this garbage? How nice that they still can't fill an hour long show.

Extreme Expose makes their way out to the ring and they're not going to dance this week. Oh dear lord! Hide! Layla has a live mic! And she's reading! Timbaland's name gets NO reaction from the crowd. For those of you who care, they girls wrestle in the video. Extreme Expose loses the match if you were wondering.

Kevin Thorn makes his way out to the ring and he's without Ariel, of course, because she was fired. Joey makes it known that Kevin Thorn is flying solo.

Kevin Thorn over a Red Shirt by Original Sin
Meh.

Monty and Burke are strategizing and Striker interrupts. Burke talks down Striker, blaming him for his loss at Judgment Day. Tonight Strikers got a match with one of the Major Brothers. Not any specific brother, just one of them. You know who's the best part of this segment? Cor Von, and he's not even talking.

Matt Striker over Brett Major by Golden Rule and twisting inverted DDT
The Lionheart Chris Jerichos have darker hair this week. Start with some arm drags by Brett, followed by a shoulder block a standing senton and that only draws a one. Striker comes back with some punches and a few a suplexes. Striker bats around Brett but gets pinned for a two on a sunset flip. TWO!

Striker maintains control with a head vice to slow the match down. Brett comes back with a few punches then misses a neckbreaker. I say "misses" because it happened, butBrett didn't have a hold on STriker in the least. Brett continues with some punches and a flying forearm gets at two. TWO!

Striker attemtps a suplex and Brett gets a small package for a two. TWO!

Brett hits a high Lou Thesz press (with a leg drop sorta) for another two. TWO!

Brett gets swatted away in an attempted drop kick then hits the Golden Rule followed by a twisting inverted DDT for the pin.

For those of us who watches RAW last night, we have to watch a recap of Lashley's gauntlet match. For those of us who didn't watch it have to be subjected to it anyway. Here's your recap: Lashley beats Masters. Lashley beats Viscera. Lashley beats Umaga. Lashley beats Shane. Now we see Lashley vs. Vince in a street fight at One Night Stand 3. You know what's amazing? John Cena is headlining One Night Stand TWO YEARS IN A ROW. Gross.

Rob Van Dam's music hits and everyone has to wonder if this is the last time we'll hear it. He's followed by CM Punk who is followed by...

commercials.

I forgot to mention it, but we;re back to the ECW entrance from last week's use of the Smackdown entrance.

Rob Van Dam and CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke and Marcus Cor Von
Huge RVD chant to start. As the news circulates more and more of RVD's departure, how bug is this chant gonna get. MCV starts with a headlock and an audible "fuck". RVD goes to the ropes, but gets shoulder blocked down by MCV. RVD gets a headlock next and the same fate happens - a shoulder block knocks him down. MCV and RVD stare down to a HUGE RVD chant. RVD blocks a kick, MCV ducks a clothesline and MCV hits some punches in, throws RVD to the corner and RVD throws an elbow and over estimates the distance to hit a split legged moonsault. MCV tags in Burke and Burke clubs RVD a bit. More "RVD" from the crowd and I wonder when they'll start the "please don't go" chants. RVD hits some arm drags, attempts a kick on Burke, misses and goes for an enziguiri. That misses and RVD winds up in a bear hug from behind by Burke. RVD hits a few elbows to break out, RVD makes the quick tag and Burke misses it and gets hit by a springboard clothesline from Punk. Punk hits MCV off of the apron and then clotheslines Burke over the top to the floor. We go to commercials with Burke and Punk in the ring.

We're back and MCV has control. During the break RVD hit a monkey flip on Burke and MCV threw RVD to the floor from the top turnbuckle. RVD takes more damage in the ring and Burke can only get a two. TWO!

Burke goes for a submission and RVD gets strong crowd support. Burke gives up on the hold and attacks the knees. He can only get a two. TWO!

Burke tags in MCV and MCV puts RVD in the corner and attacks the knee. MCV only gets a two. TWO!

Burke comes in, RVD gets a small package, but Burke's leg is in the rope. Burke continues the offense of RVD in the corner, trying to take out the knee, including a knee drop to the back of RVD's knee. Burke can't get a three. TWO!

MCV gets tagged in and pounds on RVD on the ground going back to the knee with a leg lace. MCV drops some knees on RVD's knees and tags in Burke. RVD hits an enziguiri and RVD hits the hot tag to Punk who drops MCV and Burke. Punk throws Burke to the corner and hits the knee lift and bulldog, but MCV breaks up the count. RVD tries to splash MCV out of the ring but instead hits nothing but the ground. IN the ring Punk's got Burke ready to go to sleep, but MCV hits a shoulder block to the midsection instead. MCV hits the POOOUUUNNNNCCEEEE and the match ends because.... MCV isn't the legal man?

RVD comes in and gets attacked by Cor Von and Burke and gets a POOUUUUUNNNCCEEEEE of his own. The show ends with Burke and MCV taunting Punk and RVD.

The Inside Pulse:Okay, so not the worst show we've seen, but this one was a weird one. They're trying to get some angles on TV to add some matches for One Night Stand that could be actual ECW matches. It's good to see them going somewhere with SNITSKY, even if it is putting him over RVD and ONS3. I'll say thing thought, we went an entire show without seeing the ECW champion or the #1 contender outside of recap videos. It's nice to see that the show's not even important enough to feature it's own champion. A pretty good main event for a below average show. Kinda like hot peanut butter topping on praline ice cream.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

This is part two of my interview with Nigel Mcguinness. The topics included in this podcast are comparing matches Morishima and Bryan Danielson, what it takes to put on a blow away match, what it means to be called "the next big thing", Mick Foley, why it's important to watch all the shows on the card, if a bad attitude can do more harm than a good attitude can do good.

Originally posted at Inside Pulse.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

Let's go over some news bits from the week before jumping right into the show.

The big piece of news is that the Rob Van Dam goodwill tour of 2007 has a distinct end in sight. According to a news post from Burnside, Rob Van Dam's last show with the WWE will be at ONS3. To replace RVD's star power on ECW, the WWE is thinking of sending Randy Orton to the show. I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that being on ECW is viewed as a punishment. Then again, all the guys on the show might be thinking that too.

As a side note, I hope we see Rob Van Dam in Ring of Honor and not in TNA at all. Everyone who we've heard from who has had any contact with TNA has said that they're no signing anyone new until they get a two hour time slot. I doubt this "rule" will stick with RVD, but I sincerely hope he doesn't go to TNA. Maybe all he needs to do is watch the show and make that realization for himself.

Meanwhile I don't think that we'll see that much of the ECW title on the ECW show anymore. They seem content to keep the ECW title on RAW, which is something that I've been saying for a while now. The Lashley v. McMahon feud that's been going on for months now will most likely continue going down the Austin line as Vince can't wrestle a full program and Lashley's injured and needs the protection of sportz entertainment until his injury heals up.

Anyway... on to the show.

So we open with a recap of last night. That Lashley beatdown and blah blah blah. Check out more with our RAW coverage.

The live show opens with Vince addressing the camera. He talks some trash to Lashley pimping their match. Vince announces the New Breed vs. Bobby Lashley for tonight and another 3 on 1 match at Judgement day. Whatever.

So the whole ECW Originals vs. New Breed has to be over. THEY RELEASED SABU. He showed up late and without his gear. This has been a bad week for ECW news. Shows me for going away for a vacation.

Rob Van Dam is in the ring and Joey calls this match punishment by Mr. McMahon for what happened last week. That's funny on multiple levels.

Rob Van Dam over SNITSKY by DQ
Both men stare down to start. Rob Van Dam gets beat down by SNITSKY, but tries to fight back with some kicks. They don't work all that well and RVD gets some more kicks. SNITSKY hits a body slam and two elbows, but that only gets a two. TWO!

SNITSKY goes for some forearms to the chest, then gets some boots in the corner. SNITSKY hits a vertical suplex, but can only get two. TWO!

I don't think Rob Van Dam is in this match. It might as well be a red shirt out there. RVD gets some elbows in, but is clubbed down by SNITSKY. SNITSKY holds RVD in an underhook and RVD breaks out with some knees, but the momentum is cut short. RVD avoids getting squashed in the corner and manages to get some offense in. RVD finally gets SNITSKY down with a windmill kick, but missed Rolling thunder. RVD avoids a big boot and SNITSKY gets crotched on the ropes. RVD hits a running spin kick to knock SNITSKY off the ropes, but RVD can't get a break and gets a nasty clothesline. SNITSKY gets pissed, grabs a chair and hits RVD for the DQ finish.

How... boring. We were supposed to see Kevin Thorn beat Sabu, but instead we're gonna see a show that was scrambled together at the last minute. A shame no one thought to just put more wrestling on the show. The good news is that CM Punk is wrestling next.

CM Punk over Stevie Richards by Go to Sleep CM Punk hasn't wrestled all that many matches in ECW. I think that about a quarter of them have been against Stevie. Punk's sporting the DDP rib tape today to better sell the POOOOUUUNNNNNCCCEEEE from last week. Punk goes to the kicks early in the match followed by an exploder suplex. Richards goes for the ribs with a short knee and some kicks. Richards rips the tape off of Punk and continues with the kicks. CM Punk goes for more kicks, but it's cut short.

Richards gets a nice bow and arrow on Punk, but Punk battles out and goes for three pinfall attempts. Stevie hits a standing Warrior's Way on Punk for a two. TWO!

Damn. Richards continues the punishment with a grapevvine and some more kicks. Stevie misses something in hte corner and gets crotched on the turnbuckle. Punk hits a hanging neckbraker from the second turnbuckle, but can only get a two. TWO!

Richards goes for a tornado DDT, but instead Punk reverses it into a Go to Sleep. Here's something to note: Stevie Richards has never beat CM Punk.

Burke's in the back with Striker and Cor Von and Burke says he'll lead them to victory.

Kevin Thorn and Ariel come out, freshly quit from the New Breed. Well, he's not gonna beat Sabu tonight, who's he gonna fight? Uh oh.

Kevin Thorn over Nunzio by Dark Kiss Nunzio is hailing from Rockland County, New York tonight. MY prediction is that no matches are remotely interesting tonight. I don't think this will be any different. Thorn over powers Nunzio as I'm losing interest of the show. I tried Fresca for the first time tonight. Fresca's pretty good. It's kinda like 7-Up and Sprite, but it's a little lighter. Doesn't have the same bite that the other two lemon-lime drinks do. That's a good thing, because that's what I don't like about those drinks. It's not quite Moxie, but it's nice. Have you had Moxie? Moxie's a great soda that doesn't get as much credit as it deserves.

Ariel's looking a little weird lately. Maybe it's her new "classier" image.

Torrie Wilson saying that no one likes Melina has some humor to it based n the backstage goings on that has leaked to the internet. Every now and again they let some things slip that make the internet laugh, that's one and earlier tonight Styles saying that RVD was fighting SNITSKY as punishment for what he said last week was also a laugher.

Ugh. It's Extreme Expose. As usual Kelly is a beat or two behind the other two strippers. I don't care what Andy Wheeler has to say about them, it's pointless on ECW.

In case we didn't watch RAW, or the beginning of the show, they replay the video from earlier in the show.

Oh goody. Lashley's gonna talk. Hearing them refer to anything as the "No Touch Rule" is creepy. A no touch rule sounds like something that you implement with your 13 year old daughter's 18 year old boyfriend. Not when you're Bobby Lashley.

Lashley over the New Breed
Alright, it's main event time. Burke starts the match against Lashley and gets control with a headlock to start? Lashley has had enough and responds with a hanging vertical suplex. Isn't this guy supposed to be hurt? Burke tags in the Alpha Male in a match I want to see one on one. The two tie up and are pretty much evenly matched. Lashley goes behind, Cor Von gets out with an elbow and runs to the ropes, Lashley leapfrogs Cor Von and hits a forearm, knocking MCV to the canvas. Might as well call this one proper, as it's the only wrestling match all night.

Striker tags himself in during a staredown and immediately gets body slammed and thrown around by Lashley. Lashley gets Striker out of the ring and MCV attacks Lashley as Burke distracts the ref. MCV throws Lashley at the ropes and runs to the opposite. Now this next part is the important part.

Lashley is supposed to get pounced out of the ring, but can't get to the ropes from where he's standing in the ring. He runs diagonally VERY SLOWLY once he bounces off the ropes and makes the universal "come here" signal with his arm to MCV to hit him with the pounce. MCV barely hits him and Lashley flies over the top rope. This whole match just went clown shoes.

Striker is still the legal man and tags Burke in, who can' decide what way to pin Lashley and when he finally does he puts Lashleys boot on the bottom rope AND Lashley kicks out. Who says these guys are too green? MCV is back in and continues having control over Lashley. MCV goes for a rear naked choke, but Lashley powers out, misses a clothesline on MCV and gets belly to back suplexed. Burke is tagged in and hits a dropped fist from the second rope on Lashley's midsection. Burke gets belly to belly-ed and tags in MCV. MCV is met with some punches and forearms and he runs back to the corner, tags Striker and rolls out of the ring. Striker is pulled in by Lashley and is shoulder blocked in the corner. Lashely hits a few clotheslines and then throws Striker to the canvas in a very impressive power move followed by the spear to the end the match.

The Inside Pulse: What a crappy show. This whole thing was a waste of time. The only match they were really supposed to pump was CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke. There two guys have no other venjue to promote their match and what do we get? Burke's team is beaten by one man in a handicapped match and CM Punk beat Stevie Richards for the SEVENTH time that I can count, Kevin Thorn had a useless match against Nunzio and they sacrificed most of the roster to the #1 contender. They showed two different promos for Lashley vs. McMahon, but they couldn't even put one promo together for CM Punk vs. Elijah Burke. Shows how much they give a crap about that feud.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

This week Wrestling Pulse posted a brief interview with ROH's Nigel McGuinness as a preview of sorts to this interview. This is part one of a three part interview with Nigel.

Ring of Honor
http://www.nigelmcguinness.com/

Originally posted at Inside Pulse.

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page



Dear Wrestling Fans,
I am the ECW Champion. I have the ECW championship and will not release it until more of you are watching ECW and buy more PPVs. Dave Lagana and Dusty Rhodes are useless against me. You have until ECW is renewed or you will never see ECW or the championship belt ever again.
Vince McMahon

The show starts with a recap of Backlash's ECW title match.

Let the bodies hit the floor.

The arena is real small tonight and the entrance ramp is even smaller. Lashley's music hits and he looks upset in his new t-shirt. The crowd tries to cheer him up with some chants of his name, but he's still upset anyway. He's got a mic, this could get ugly.

Lashley addresses the crowd talking about how no one is happy except the McMahons, but he has a way of making it all better. That is giving Vince the beating of a lifetime. He doesn't care if he's got an injured shoulder. Lashley wants a rematch. Instead of Vince, we get Estrada in a wheelchair and a neck brace still selling the effects of Lashley's beating last week.

He says he won't let Lashley ruin this special night. He blames Lashley that Vince was shaved bald. Actually, I think that's Hogan and Big Show's fault. Third on the list would be the Great Khali. THEN Lashley. Estrada never got the memo that Lashley being Trump's representative was the third best option. He says Lashley will get a rematch, but not tonight.

We get a rehashing of the old Austin angle and Lashley can't touch Vince, Shane or Umaga without being physically provoked. If he does he'll lose his rematch. Estrada leaves himself off the list, which is a mistake. Armando realizes this and gets wheeled by Lashley to the stairs by the ring. Lashley's music hits and we go to commercial after a few replays.

Elijah Burke is backstage holding court with the New Breed complaining about CM Punk and how he turned his back on the New Breed.

Next up... CM Punk! He's back to being a face on his way to the ring. He's got "CAPPS" written on his arm tape for Matt Cappotelli. We get a replay of Punk's beating on Burke following last week's eight man elimination match.

The New Breed follows Punk. Burke is upset that the New Breed got used by Punk. Burke says Punk's gonna fight, and he's gonna fight Kevin Thorn. Thorn doesn't look all that happy.

CM Punk over Kevin Thorn by Go to Sleep Punk starts with a hammer lock and a high knee, but Thorn takes control quickly with some kicks and forearms to Punk's chest. Thorn goes quickly to a rear naked choke that Punk powers out of, ducks a few clotheslines and attempts a cross body but gets caught and thrown to the floor. Punk gets his strikes in and finishes with a Go to Sleep.

Burke's not too happy and leaves the arena area.

They replay the video package of the interviews with the Originals from Monday and WWE.com and we go to commercials. Later tonight we'll get the confrontation between the Originals and Vince. But up next is the Nitro Girls. Yuck.

So it's extreme expose time and they're dancing to Warrant's Cherry Pie. At least I know the song this week. Has anyone seen the Suicide Girls special that's aired on Cinemax? This has less substance than that.

Thorn confronts the New Breed (and speaks!) asking where they were. Burke gives him some crap for losing to Punk. Thorn says that as far as Burke and the New Breed is concerned, he quits. Wow. That guy has some charisma when he speaks. Why hasn't he spoken yet? Oh yeah, this is ECW. Never mind.

The Originals video package is shown one more time. Dreamer blames Vince for the death of ECW. Funny, I'd blame one man who could book on hell of a wrestling promotion, but didn't know jack about running a successful company.

Brian and Brett Majors over Matt Striker and Marcus Cor Von w/Elijah Burke The Major brothers are from Long Island New York. I like them already. Striker starts and the Majors have control until Marcus is tagged in. MCV dismantles the Majors brother that's in the ring with a press slam into a fall away slam. I guess they couldn't reform the FBI this week to fight the New Breed. MCV misses a shoulder block in the corner and both teams tag out. The other Majors brother has control of Striker until MCV hits the ring. MCV throws one Majors out, goes to back body drop him but Majors sunset flips Striker for a two. TWO!

MCV is pulled out of the ring by the other Majors and Striker pounds on Majors. Striker goes for something in the corner but instead gets cross body blocked for a three count!

Burke berates Striker post match and Striker walks away upset like Burke just kicked his dog. I'm sure no one saw that loss coming after Thorn lost his match earlier in the night.

I wonder which was worse. Vince winning the ECW title off of Lashley or Vince jobbing Tazz out to HHH on WWE television after Tazz beat Mike Awesome for the ECW title. Both were pretty humiliating for the ECW title. I suppose I would actually choose jobbing out Tazz on television because ECW still had an infinitely small chance of surviving after the title changed hands from Mike Awesome to Tazz.

Ugh. Next up we've got our new ECW world champion, Mr. McMahon. Do you know it was seven years almost to the day that David Arquette won the WCW world championship? How disgusting is that?

Vince says he is going to do something he might regret. Vince he says he's going to expose himself, and he takes off his jacket to expose the ECW world heavyweight championship belt. I think I just threw up in my mouth. Vince says he'll fight Lashley, but when are where Vince wants. Vince changes gears to the ECW Originals.

Best sign of the night: WHERE'S WCW?

Vince invites the Originals to the ring if they've got the guts. The ECW music hits and the Originals parade out from the back. I like how Richards, Balls and Little Guido aren't considered "Originals" for some reason. He addresses RVD first.

RVD says he Vince killed ECW and it's a mockery of what the Originals stand for. Next is Sabu, who just stares at Vince. Third is Sandman, who shows Vince three fingers and asks him to read between the lines. Vince points out Dreamers gold boots, then asks him what he thinks.

"You think you brought back ECW in your image? The fans demanded ECW come back. Not you. And your name may be on my paycheck, but each and every one of these people and the millions at home pay my salary. And they know about the spirit of ECW." -Tommy Dreamer

Vince says talk is cheap. He wants to know who has the guts to take him on one on one. Sabu's still not talking. What a surprise because they haven't had a problem making him talk before. Vince makes the four Originals compete in an extreme rules fatal four way. The Originals don't look too pleased. Vince has the stage hands bring out weapons, including a cement mixer? The Originals have a conference as we go to commercials.

Alright, we're back and the match is just starting. Sabu goes for a quick pin, following by the Sandman and they pair off as Sabu and Sandman fight and Dreamer and RVD fight. RVD and Sabu are sent out of the ring leaving Dreamer and Sandman. Sandman takes a second rope clothesline from Dreamer. RVD and Sabu start throwing weapons into the ring. RVD puts a chair on Dreamer as he hits Rolling thunder and Sabu hits a leg drop simultaneously. Dreamer hits Sandman and Sabu with a a trash can. Dreamer clotheslines Sandman out of the ring and and gets dropped across the barricade by Sandman. Sandman is hit by a baseball slide by Sabu. Sabu throws himself at RVD on the apron and they head out of the ring. IN the ring, Sandman hits a bulldog on Dreamer on a trash can. That only gets at two. TWO!

Sandman goes to the top, but gets a trash can to the lower lumbar region. Dreamer brings a chair into the ring as Sandman's in a Tree of Woe. Sandman takes a double leg drop kick by Dreamer in the tree of woe. RVD belly to backs Sabu on the Cane but can only get a two. TWO!

RVD skateboards the Sandman and hits Sabu with a chair, but gets pile driven by Dreamer and bounces about three feet into the air from the bounce. That guy needs to give lessons on that. Dreamer goes into his Jesus Christ pose, but gets caned. Sandman gets hit with a chair by Sabu, followed by the triple jump moonsault, which only gets a two. TWO!

Sabu brings a table into the ring and sets it up. Sandman is laid out on the table, Sabu goes up to the top rope but is intercepted by Dreamer. Dreamer superplexes Sabu into the Sandman who is still on the table. Ow.

RVD hits the five star frog splash on the Sandman and that's the match. I suppose the goodwill tour isn't over after all. Next week it's Rob Van Dam vs. Vince McMahon. Interesting.

Originally posted at: Inside Pulse

Check out the site at KendoSticksandMicrophones.com

Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page



So we're starting with the recap of the accidental slide of a chair from CM Punk to RVD instead of Elijah Burke. Looks like they're finally going to focus the show on the right guy. That'd be CM Punk, not Bobby Lashley.

Punk is watching the recap and looks a little pained. He apologizes to the New Breed. But not for trying to assume some leadership, or telling them how it is, or that they need independent thinkers. Punk gives a motivational speech and wants to know if everyone's on the same page. Marcus says he's gonna let it go and Punk gives one more apology to Burke. No one looks too happy about it...

"Let the bodies hit the floor."

Wait a second, we're starting with an Umaga match? Are you kidding me? Against LASHLEY? What the hell are they thinking? They give away an hour long match AND Lashley vs. Umaga in the same week? Perhaps they'll also throw in Kennedy vs. the Undertaker on Smackdown while they're at it. If yesterday's any indication Lashley's gonna lose this one.

Bobby Lashley over Umaga by DQ

They square off and bore me until Umaga start trading blows. Lshley goes for Estrada after being thrown over the top rope and pays for it. Umaga gains control and introduces Lashley to the steel steps. Steps vs. face. Face rarely wins. Umaga goes for the announce position tables next and Lashley comes back only to lost momentum under the Ricky Steamboat rule of the face never getting five moves off unless it's the finish. that's why it's the five moves of doom, btw.

Lashley misses a top rope spot and walks into a Samoan drop. Lashley's hurting and Umaga goes for the Greco-Roman punches to the head while your opponent is down. Umaga goes tot the second rope but misses a headbutt off the second rope. anyone remember Rene Dupree's bottom stair axe handle? I miss those days.

The crow does the "boo" "yay" thing, cheering for Lashley and booing Umaga. Lashley throws a bunch of punches and goes for a lariat, Umaga stops him short. Lashley clotheslines Uga out of the ring and Estrada attacks Lashley from behind for the DQ finish. The point of this? Lashley "sends a message" by beating up Estrada. All that says to me is that he can beat up a wrestling personality, not three men in a title match. Vince cools Umaga off as Estrada plays dead.

commercials...

We're not live in London. Joey cares about England's history and Tazz doesn't care all that much. Joey and Tazz are at ringside, which is a change from last week. Joey makes some bad segue into Stone Cold's movie coming up. You know, Running Man 2. Why wasn't Khali in this movie? While I won;t mention it by name, I'll probably go see it. Mostly because it's a SUPEr-ACTION MOVIE!

Backstage Burke talks about a problem. He thinks Punk being in the New Breed was a mistake on the group's part. Marcus reminds him that it was Burke's choice to o that. Burke calls Thorn "Vampire". I like that for some reason. Striker says that Punk is only trying to motivate them. As Burke's talking, Punk walks in and is all smiles.

Does anyone think that Goldberg's Bullrun will ever beat ECW in the ratings? Does anyone actually watch it?

It's time for SNITSKY. Looks like he didn't get his waxing in this week, he's a little hairy. For all the crap that the IWC gives the WWE for their nu-metal generic themes, SNITSKY's theme is probably the best theme since Kane's. His opponent? YES! This is the match I wanted to see last week.

SNITSKY happens to Balls Mahoney by big ass boot Nice. SNITSKY overpowers Balls and Balls tries a running approach, but that doesn't work either. SNITSKY throws some forearms to Balls, then pinks him up in a side power bomb position and runs him into the corner. SNITSKY lcoks Balls in a double underhook lock and runs Balls into the corner. This is followed by a clothesline out of the corner. A big boot finishes the match.

Okay, so that wasn't as good as I had hoped. It was even remotely as good as I thought it was going to be. All these squashes for SNITSKY aren't doing much outside of letting people know he's still on the roster.

Backstage Punk is talking up the New Breed. Tonight he says will change the face of the New Breed. Burke interrupts to say he's been preparing for the match, but for some reason away from the rest of the group. Where do these people go during the taping anyway?

Does anyone think that CM Punk is more likable as a heel? Well, that's still up for debate, but whatever.

My Backlash picks are Cena, Undertaker and Lashley. I say it here because I know I'll forget to submit to the round table.

ECW Originals vs. the New Breed They haven't mentioned that this match is the rubber match yet. Joey and Tazz make some clever jokes about the Sandman drinking at local bars. The New Breed approach the ring as the anticipation grows and...

commercials.

Is CM Punk going to wrestle in this match? Certainly looks it.

CM Punk is going to wrestle. As a matter of fact, he's going to start the match for the New Breed. Maybe not. Burke's got a mic and says it should be a fair fight. Instead of 5 on 4, Burke says Punk should "take a seat" rather than wrestle. Dammit! I see an end for this feud, it's too long to explain, but I'll get into it during the podcast.

Burke and Dreamer start it off with Dreamer getting a take down for Burke. Burke reverses the momentum with a back elbow. Dreamer comes back with come body slams and a punch. Tag to Sabu and Dreamer body slams Sabu on Burke. Nice move.

Sabu's still selling the neck from two weeks ago. Sabu drop kicks Burke's ankles as he's running towards him to maintain control. Tag to the Sandman who drop a leg from the top rope on Burke who's hanging on the ropes. Sandman misses a Rolling Rock and Burke gets the quick pin and Sandman's eliminated. Sabu is in with Striker and gives him a spike DDT. Tag to RVD and RVD and Sabu drop three legs on Striker. RVD hit the monkey flip and Striker is writhing on the ground. RVD goes to the top, but MCV distracts RVD and RVD goes up again but gets crotched. RVD fights back and hits a sunset flip powerbomb. Striker has been taking some real punishment. A split legged moonsault and Striker is eliminated.

MCV and RVD are in the ring. MCV has control and pounds on RVD in the corner. RVD tries to fight out, but MCV's having none of it. MCV attempts to put RVD's head to the turnbuckle, but it's reversed by RVD into a kick to the face and Sabu gets the tag.

Sabu chain wrestles MCV into a camel clutch. It's odd, the New Breed is wrestling as faces and the Originals as heels. MCV makes me eat my words as he chokes Sabu after Burke snuck into the ring to hit Sabu in the neck. MCV goes after Sabu on the apron and tags Burke in. Burke goes for some kicks to the head but can only draw a two. TWO!

Burke slows things down and can't get more than a two on Sabu. TWO!

Tag to MCV and he continues the pounding on Sabu. Irish whip to the corner and then Sabu knees a charging MCV. MCV maintains control and attempts a suplex but it's countered. Sabu runs to the ropes and gets a back elbow. Followed by the POOOOUNNNCEEE!!! And Joey actually says it's the pounce. Sabu gets eliminated following the Pounce. Period.

Dreamer is in and takes control as we go to commercials. Whew.

We're back and it's Burke and Dreamer. Thorn is tagged in for the first time in the match. Not MCV is tagged in. Dreamer ducks a clothesline but then gets belly to belly suplexed. Dreamer goes tot he outside and continues to get beat down on by MCV. MCV crotches Dreamer on the barrier and gets eliminated.

Thorn runs in and gets a crossface on Dreamer without hooking the arm. Dreamer fights out and Thorn plants Dreamer with a great spinebuster but that only gets a two. TWO!

Burke is tagged in and drops some knees on Dreamer. Thorn is tagged back in and runs into Dreamer in the corner hard. Dreamer hits a DDT and Eliminates thorn. Burke hits the Elijah Express and eliminates Dreamer. We're down to Burke and RVD. I have a feeling that CM Punk is still in the match. Burke tries to cheat a three count but the ref catches him. Burke works the arm as the crowd rallies for Rob Van Vam. RVD powers out buts walks into a lariat with a leg sweep.

Burke pounds in the corner but RVD rallies back. RVD takes control with clotheslines and a superkick. Burke goes to jump over the ropes into the ring, but gets spin kicked but RVD mid air! Wowwee wow wow.

CM Punk lays out Burke with a round kick in the back of the head! RVD rolls Burke into the ring and Burke is out. RVD hits the frog splash to eliminate Burke!

The Originals win and RVD celebrates as CM Punk looks confused as he steps into the ring. Burke is out in the middle of the ring and picks up Burke. CM Punk has Burke up in a fireman's carry and hits the Go to Sleep on Burke. Punk apologizes sarcastically again as Punk's music hits. Punk is all smiles as the show ends.

We open with a recap of Punk's choice to side with the New Breed.  Let's see how this one pans out...

Let the Bodies Hit the Floor...

The ECW music hits and we're in in Milan Italy, Joey makes sure we know that he and Tazz are overdubbed.  The New Breed is in the ring and Burke talks about CM Punk's decision.  Cor Von has no shirt, Striker has a suit on and Ariel is still going with the greaser/indie chick look.

CM Punk is introduced and he walks out different than we've seen him before.  Punk's got a nice way about him as a heel.  He's on his way to having a beard and has a different swagger about him.  He gets some attention from Ariel and shakes hands all around.  The crowd is split between chanting his name and booing him.  Burke says it's obvious why Punk joined the New Breed, but he wants Punk to tell the world himself.

Punk gets instant heat as soon as he starts talking.  He says he's going to keep his reasons to himself.  He says it's obvious why he made the decision he did.  He calls himself an official member of the New Breed.

Rob Van Dam crashes the party and shakes his head disapprovingly.  He interrupts Burke and tells him to shut his mouth.  I'm not doing it justice, but RVD actually sounds like he cares.  RVD reminds Punk of the offer he made last week to join the Originals.  RVD says that now the Originals are gonna make Punk regret his choice.  Burke calls the Originals old and washed up and he's got some real heel heat.

RVD has been holding back his feeling and he knows how to get them out, and it involves RVD and Elijah fighting tonight.  I'll see that match. in a heart beat.  Punk has some words for RVD, saying that if he wants to challenge a leader in the New Breed, he should challenge Punk.  Burke cuts Punk off and accepts the challenge.  Damn.  I'd rather see RVD vs. Punk, but RVD vs. Burke is a good consolation prize.

Little Guido walks out to the reaction you'd expect from the Italian crowd.  Too bad the WWE always crushes people when they are in their home town, or in this case, their home country.

SNITSKY happens to Little Guido by Big Boot
It's a rule in the WWE that you can't win a match in your home town.  Just ask Rey Mysterio Jr. about that.  The guy hasn't won in San Diego, or even walks out with his own two feet.

This one goes pretty much how you could expect.  The crowd chants for Nunzio, but he's in the ring with Snitsky.  He gets a few kicks on SNITSKY and a drop kick to the back of the head, followed by another drop kick to the face.

Nunzio gets thrown around more and Tazz reminds us that when the Italians whistle when Americans would boo.  SNITSKY hits a big boot and the crowd DIED.  Words can't discuss how quiet the arena got once SNITSKY hit his boot.

Backstage Punk and Burke are talking about how Burke's not scared of RVD.  Punk thinks he's scared.  Burke tells Punk that he's gonna have to "fall in line".  Bitch.

Here's a rule to follow when watching WWE programming.  You don't win in your hometown.  You NEVER win in your hometown.   As a matter of fact, you'll be decimated by whatever giant or monster heel your promotion has.  When Rey was destroyed in San Diego by Khali, no one batted an eye.  Rey had gotten his ass kicked every single time he had been wrestling in San Diego before that.  I have time to think about all of this because they're showing another promo for the condemned.

Meanwhile, Kevin Thorn and Marcus Cor Von are in the ring.

Tommy Dreamer and the Sandman over Marcus Cor Von & Kevin Thorn by sunset flip
The two teams can't figure out who's going to be in what corner.  They eventually figure it out and MCV and Dreamer start it off.  MCV gives up control early to Dreamer and Sandman who get quick tags.  Sandman goes for a Heinekenrana but it gets blocked and MCV gets a tag to Cor Von.

Thorn has Sandman in a rear chin lock and the crowd cheers him up, but Thorn takes control once the Sandman fight out.  MCV is back in beating down on Sandman as the crowd cheers for him.  The problem is the WWE thinks that just because it's a new crowd they think they can overly abuse the power out of the rest hold spot and the crowd will eat it up.

MCV comes back in and Sandman takes more abuse.  Dreamer gets a hot tag and clears house.  Dreamer hits a nice series of moves with a neck breaker on Thorn a drop kick to MCV then a sunset flip to Thorn for the pin holding the ropes.  The faces win and celebrate with the crowd as they clear the ring.  The crowd really loves the Originals.

Punk is talking to Striker saying that they don't need to fall in line, they need independent thinkers and people with moral fiber.  Nice touch.  I wish that they'd wait a little bit before teasing the tension here, but oh well.

Lashley's music hits and the crowd goes relatively crazy for him.  Why do they give this guy the mic on a regular basis?  Can't he practice at house shows?  Why does he have to do it on live TV?  Lashley intro the video recap from last night, which saves him from having to actually to tell the crowd about what happened last night.  By the way, Santino Marella is no unknown.  How do I know this?  He already has his own music.  At least they're giving him a backstory that he's an actual wrestler and not just some guy. I doubt they're going to talk about how this is the guy who got Cornette fired from OVW.  Check out the

He speaks some Italian and I don't understand a word.  I wonder how good his Italian is, cause he was billed as Russian in OVW. OVW profile of Boris Alexiev.  Lashley's music plays and...  that's it?  That's all we get?

commercials

Backstage Punk is giving MCV and Thorn a pep talk.  Burke is looking from a distance and Burke looks bothered.  He says Punk needs to fall in line.  Punk says he has Burke's back tonight and walks away.  Where are the wrestlers walking backstage all the time?

Rob Van Dam over Elijah Burke by Five Star Frog Splash
No Sabu tonight.  I wonder if he's able to cross the borders or if the WWE kept him home just in case he gets arrested again.

Commercials...

Burke comes to the ring solo, and he doesn't look to happy about it.  The crowd is firmly behind RVD to start and certainly not behind Burke.  Burke does some finger poking to start, followed by a slap.  RVD returns with a spin kick to the head.  Burke regains composure and takes control of the match going after RVD's shoulder.  RVD reverses a back body drop with his flip followed buy a spinning heel kick.  RVD hits a springboard splash off the second turnbuckle and can only get a two.  TWO!

RVD hits some shoulder blocks in the corner, misses one and Burke has control again.  Burke has a reverse wrist lock on RVD, trying to get the crowd to rally behind RVD.  Do I need to remind you that you don't simply get out of a rest hold?  Burke hits a flying arm bar but can only get a two.  TWO!

Burke gets a Cobra Clutch as RVD powers out.  Burke maintains control attacking the shoulder.

Burke and RVD trade blows and Burke sends RVD into the steel post and a belly to back suplex.  Burke can only get a two (TWO!) and keeps an arm bar on on RVD.  Burke can only get a two and he complains to BG James' brother about it.

The crowd is chanting something in italian, and I barely speak English.  Burke goes tot he shoulder in a rest hold again and RVd powers out once more.  RVD ducks a clotheslines and hits a few of his own.  RVD gets ten punches in the corner and the crowd counts... in English?  RVD whips Burke into the corner and hits a monkey flip.  RVD goes in again and hits the ref.  Burke ducks a kick and RVD hits the ref again.

Joey has a nice call.  "We've got a zebra down in the corner"

RVD attempts to wake the ref up, and it gives Burke time to wake up.  RVD misses a rolling thunder and instead hits Burke's knees.  CM Punk makes his way out to the ring and goes to throw Burke a chair but it goes right by him and to RVD, who uses the chair on Burke's face instead.  RVD hits the frog splash and his tour of good will continues.

Punk looks.. somewhat remorseful about the chair toss and goes into the ring to talk to Burke and apologize.

Originally posted at: Inside Pulse

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Thanks to Failed Silence for the theme for the show. Check them out at their myspace page

The music starts us off from the top today so we've gotta be in for a packed show. I don't know how "packed" it's gonna be with Vince on the show.

Speaking of Vince, as I typed his name he came out to his music which interrupted the ECW music. I wonder if this works across the board.

Chris Jericho.

Lance Storm.

Hmmm. No such luck. Vince is still on his way to the ring. I missed RAW, but apparently Lashley got his ass kicked and we're on our way to seeing a very SPORTZ entertainment ECW title defense. Vince is still talking about being shaved. Doesn't he know that story lines are supposed to move forward? They're not supposed to continue on and on and on. Then again, Backlash has a nasty habit of showing rematches from Wrestlemania.

Vince wants revenge and Austin and Trump aren't around to punish. Vince wants to get revenge on Lashley. Why not fire him? Because it's wrestling, that's why. Vince gets heat for saying Lashley isn't here tonight. So that means the main event tonight, right? Wait, he's barred Lashley from the building. CERTAINLY main event tonight. The crowd is booing that? I'd be cheering my balls off.

Anyone think that Vince looks like Backlund with a bald head?

It's laughable to hear Shane talk about his family's dignity at Wrestlemania. Maybe he doesn't remember fighting his father over the WCW issue. Or the four corners Wrestlemania 2000 match. The rumors about Shane and Steph fighting backstage is funny as hell.

Anyway, the replay is finally done and we're almost ten minutes into the show and no one but Vince has been shown on the program. Way to utilize that roster you paid for Vince. To think that Mike Knox and Little Guido are still getting paid this week. Vince doesn't know how to be short and sweet anymore, does he? Instead we get these long drawn out monologues. Vince stops talking right on the ten ten mark and we are going to commercials after six minutes of McMahon and four minutes from RAW last night.

What the hell happens when someone on the three person side of the handicapped match wins? Does whoever scores the pin win the title?

Backstage CM Punk is warming up and is interrupted by RVd, who fellates CM Punk's performance. RVD says that everything that Punk stands for the Originals stands for. Like RVD's getting high and Sandman's smoking drinking. Burke wants a choice to be made next week and CM Punk says he's gonna give an answer tonight now that he's getting it from both sides.

Dreamer limps his way to the ring from last week's extreme rules match. They replay Dreamer getting dropped back first on a chair. Damn those spots look good. I bet they hurt too.

Next is Kevin Thorn and Ariel, who's sporting the retro roller girl/indie rock/greaser girl look. He's holding his head and...

CM Punk over Stevie Richards by roll through
Another match between these two?  Didn't we see this after CM Punk made quick work of Justin Credible?

Matt Striker comes down to ringside and once he makes his entrance, here comes the Sandman.  And here comes the commercials.

Sorry.  This time you'll have to find your own required reading.

We're back and Punk has control over Big Stevie Cool.  Punk hits some kicks in the corner and missed a splash from the top.  Stevie  hits some knees and attacks the ribs and can only get a two count.  TWO!

Stevie has a.... bear hug?  Punk hits some elbows and Stevie turns it into a bely to back.  Stevie goes for an abdominal stretch but Punk hits a knee instead.  They trade punches until Punk hits a kick to the head.  Punk hits a knee lift in the corner but only gets a two count.  TWO!

Sandman and Striker argue outside and Striker ducks a cane shot which hits Punk instead.  Whoops.  Stevie almost gets a three count, but Punk rolls through and gets the win.  Sandman talks to Punk about how long they've known each other, apparently since 98.  I couldn't make out the place that they met.  A nice touch by the Sandman to include that kinda stuff.

It's the Nitro Girls and they're dancing to a Hives song.  Or at least it said it was a Hives song.  I don't remember the rapper in that band.  this one's a booty shaker and Kelly is her usual beat or two behind the other two girls.  They make it through the whole dance before SNITSKY!!!

Layla cant make it out in time and she's face to face with SNITSKY.  SNITSKY broods and Layla tries to act scared.  

Balls Mahoney hits SNITSKY from behind with a chair before SNITSKY happens to Balls Mahoney.  Another week, another paycheck, right Balls?

Styles talks about Punk needing to make a choice tonight as we get the video from tonight recapped.  actually, replayed in it's entirety.  Nice rib by RVD asking Burke if "the adults can have a talk".

Marcus Cor Von w/Elijah Burke with a towel over Rob Van Dam w/Sabu in a neckbrace by POUNCE.  PERIOD.

Alright, let's do this.  Rob Van Dam vs. Cor Von as a main event?  I like it.  We come back in time to catch Cor Von's entrance.

Do we need to have a talk about why Sabu in a neck brace is ridiculous?  What could be more odd?  They changed Cor Von's music to some mo-town influenced music from the soul music.  Yeah, "The Alpha Male" really has this kinda attitude.

Cor Von overpowers RVD in a lock up and gives a clean break in the corner.  RVD goes for a headlock and ducks a clothes line and MCV ducks a kick and we get an old fashioned ECW standoff!  If it's possible to be a standoff mark, I'm it.  MCV overpowers RVD tossing him around and almost reversing a monkey flip into a powerbomb but RVD turns it into a 'rana.

Elijah calls Cor Von Monty as "Monty" retains control.  Cor Von has a stretch move on RVD, RVD attempts to power out, but MCV turns it into a neck braker.  That only draws a two.  TWO!

Cor Von goes for more punches in the corner and RVD gets a kick on a charging Cor Von and can only a a two with a body scissor pin.  TWO!

The crowd is DEAD.  DEAD DEAD.

Of course now the crowd chants for RVD just as I type that and he gets out of the rest hold and misses the enzuguiri and Cor Von hits a release German suplex and RVD lands on his face.  nice.  Cor Von stays on him hitting a snap suplex into a headlock.

RVD rallies the crowd that's still awake and Cor Von intercepts a kick with an axe handle and Cor Von maintains control.  He can't get a three as Joey and Tazz talk all over each other.

Cor Von must have been told by the ref to keep the rest holds on because he's back to the headlock AGAIN and RVD battles out AGAIN.  RVD hits some clotheslines and kicks and Sabu celebrates outside.  RVD hits a side kick and goes for the legs to put Cor Von down and hits a corkscrew leg drop.  TWO!

RVD hits a sidekick from up top as Burke attacks Sabu outside.  RVD runs to help Sabu and Cor Von hits the POUNCE.

Wait a second.  Cor Von's old music hits for a moment before CM Punk makes his way to ringside.

Punk's in the ring and is squaring off with Burke and Cor Von.  He puts his head down, looks to the crowd and... SHAKES BURKE'S HAND!

CM PUNK IS A MEMBER OF THE NEW BREED!

Punk is hoisted on the shoulders of the New Breed and we've got our newest heel in ECW!

I LOVE IT.